Bray Posted August 5, 2016 Posted August 5, 2016 DISCLAIMER: This segment does not share the views of the real life person. I, in fact, think you all did a great job. Now, go fu- er, have a nice day! A camera is turned on to show a small, sturdy living room with furniture out of the ass. A young woman dressed in a Drago t-shirt steps back from the camera and smiles. Ace: First Ladies and Gentlemen Jacks alike, virgins of all ages, I wanna welcome you all to- Mother: ACE!! YOU RECORDIN YOURSELF AGAIN?!?!? Ace: [groans].... Yes, mother! Mother: YOU KNOW DAMN WELL YOU DON'T GOT NO ASS, TURN THAT DAMN CAMERA OFF! Ace: Okay, so, as I was sayin, welcome to the first annual Daily Greek Jericho Live, with your hosts, the Crown Jewel of OCW, muah, and the Broken Spirit, Greek Jericho himself, Mr. Evil Cheese!! The camera drops to the floor for a few seconds and then eventually settles on Bray, who is lying in bed hooked up to a heart monitor with his head covered in stitches and cuts everywhere. Bray S. Spur: Like I said, bandages are for pussies. Alright motherfuckers, we in here. Welcome to the show and warnings for the children, language, content, violence, bah bah black sheep type shit. Anyway, on Weekly Greek Jericho, I'm not gonna bore you to death with details about my injuries. Fuck that! We're gonna take the time each and every week to review Turmoil, aka the show that hates people like me! Why won't I do Riot? Because I don't fucking want to. He reaches for the DVR remote next to him while Ace sits in a lumpy chair near the bed. Bray S. Spur: So, as I just said, I'm gonna do what I never thought I would do. I'm gonna sit down and try to go through a Turmoil that doesn't have me on it! ...Not like I watch this shit anyway. You got the sauce, sis? Ace: You know I got the sauce. Bray S. Spur: Y'all dudes that stay on social media all day probably thought I was talking about something else, didn't you? Go back to school you back ass twaddle fucks. Mother: BRAYLIN!! WHO YOU THINK YOU CUSSIN AT? Bray S. Spur: The masses, Mother! He looks to the camera. Bray S. Spur: ....And the people that actually took their time to watch this bullshit. Bray S. Spur: Go ahead, turn it on. Turmoil 134 starts on the television screen, not an HD television because who had time for those. After the first segment featuring Malu ends, Bray pauses the show. Bray S. Spur: Brown marshmallow. Skip. Bray fast forwards to the Sugar Skull segment. He pauses before the segment even begins. Bray S. Spur: I can't even understand one fucking word she's saying. Skip. Adam Adams Segment: Bray S. Spur: Double A lookin ass. Skip. TJ Stevens vs Adam Adams: Bray S. Spur: TJ Stevens looks like one of those emo-like dudes that you find in a garage band. Jordan Jax Segment: Bray S. Spur: Those catchphrases seem familiar. Ace: Doesn't someone with a "The" at the start of their name use it? Bray S. Spur: Nah, Steve don't say that shit... The Rock, maybe? Ace: I've never heard of... "The Rock". Bray S. Spur: Of course you haven't, moving on. Seb and Jimmy Segment: Bray S. Spur: Oh look, the mustache-less guy and the midg- I mean underdog. Ace: Skip. Sees Alex Fischer Segment: Bray S. Spur: Give it about two more weeks and he'll be where I was, cutting shitty ass promos. Skip. Dustin and Cactus Segment: Bray S. Spur: Wait, so Cactus gets to have his interview show before me?!? THAT'S SOME BULLSHIT, OCW!! Ace: Moving on. Bray S. Spur: But seriously, how many stables do we have, and who the hell is in them? Ace: Someone should make a list or something so it can be clear, maybe. Bray S. Spur: Yeah... maybe. [winks at camera] Alex Fischer vs Jordan Jax Bray S. Spur: Nice moves. Cool to see some of the new blood. Ace: Where are the women at? Bray S. Spur: Probably hiding because you threatened to kill Sensation if he didn't sue somebody. Ace: Maybe. Sophia and Willow Segment: Bray S. Spur: Diva dramaaaaa... Ace: I should be there.... Bray S. Spur: You wanna get caught between that? I still stand by that Sophia would beat your ass. Ace: [crosses her arms] Oh really!? Bray S. Spur: Skip. Kassie Kage Segment: Bray S. Spur: Motherfucker.... Ace: You okay? Bray S. Spur: Fucker thinks I'm retired.... Bray S. Spur: Just wait, Kass... Austin Lee Segment: Bray S. Spur: Bout damn time this jabroni came back. Cactus vs Zeb Melrose Bray S. Spur: This Cactus dude seems pretty cool. Ace: Want me to ring him up? Bray S. Spur: Nah nah... I got plans for later. Madison, Dennis, and B-17 Segment: Bray S. Spur: The bitch, the bitch and the B. Skip. Bill Ding vs Matt Mercer Bray S. Spur: Bill Ding deserves a push, dammit! Ace: How many people have had trunks and knee pads and wrist tape on this show? Bray S. Spur: Wanna rewind? Ace: Skip. Jacob and Loki Segment: Ace: Like Randy and Tom said... Bray S. Spur: Idiots. Madison and Sophia Segment: Bray S. Spur:[/b] The bitch again, shit bucket! Ace: I think Sophia turns me on. Bray S. Spur: WHAT?!? Ace: Skip. Skull Face vs Bubba Mitchell: Bray S. Spur: I ain't afraid of no Skulls! Ace: I hear there's more Skulls on Riot. Bray S. Spur: This place is fucked.... Cactus Segment: Bray S. Spur: The fact that Cactus got VIP status before me rings my bell. Ace: VIP status? Where? Bray S. Spur: On the webs-.... Skip. Madison vs Sophia Bray S. Spur: Isn't it Sophia's birthday today? Ace: Of course! Bray S. Spur: How would you know that? Ace: Skippity. Austin Again: Bray S. Spur: Hashtag Hero standing up for his friend. Likable. Big Ed vs [sTATIC]: Ace: Was that [sTATIC]? Bray S. Spur: Match of the night right there. Ed Segment: Bray S. Spur: Yea, Ed! Don't let them censor you! Ace: I thought the most dominant force in OCW was your stench? Bray S. Spur: If you or anyone else mentions my odor again, I will mu- Ace: Skip. Jimmy vs Dustin: Bray S. Spur: Heh, cheap fuckers... Ace: Looks like you've got quite a challenge when you come back. Bray S. Spur: Maybe, but I've only got one target for now. Jackson Segment: Bray S. Spur: Poor Jackson. If only I beat Malu, I would be champion right now.... Ace: But, it would be vacated right now. Bray S. Spur: Skip to the main event. I'm getting schleepy. Main Event: Bray S. Spur: How come I haven't main evented Turmoil yet? Ace: Because you're black? Bray S. Spur: Probably. Ace: Poor Dennis got humbled. Hope he's okay. Bray S. Spur: Meh, he's dealt with worse. He'll be okay. Can't say the same for his boyfriend Kass though. Bray looks to the camera and breaths heavily. Bray S. Spur: And that was the first edition of Weekly Greek Jericho! Next week, we'll review Turmoil again and then the next... week, and then... the next week, and then... Ace: You need a hobby. Bray S. Spur: Shut the fucking camera off. The camera sizzles out. 4 "It's like the number zero...It's empty, but at the same time it holds infinite possibilities." - Igor
Bloom Posted August 5, 2016 Posted August 5, 2016 Malaka Welcome to OCW, keep tough skin, speak your mind, and most of all have fun.-Betterness "I'm going to be brutally honest here guys... all we really need for a good Riot is a few RP's from Our Hero himself... he's an awesome writer!!!" - Smythe CCWJustinTime: just funny how the shit i do goes un appreciative [10-01, 00:19] Jookie Marley: fuck u nigga [09-01, 23:50] Mr.Bentley: uploadafraud.com [09-01, 23:45] Jookie Marley: what website do we use 2 upload now? "Summercide was 2 white girls away from being a cook out" - Cyberbully 2099 " makes me laugh how its gone from all ambition era holding the titles, to 3 guys from 07 holding the main titles..haha welcome to the 'Pensioner Era' - Parker "This is all part of my plan to equalize the playing field until we have a roster of people I can actually BEAT" - Bobby Digital
Cactus Gauge Posted August 5, 2016 Posted August 5, 2016 This is great! Want to be on the Watering Hole? Message Me. http://ocwfed.tv/recapppv/Award2k16/bestnewsegment2016.png B17 - "Jordan Jax has Stone Cold moves. Rock taunts and Cena jorts. He's the wrestling equivalent of a hipster."
Bray Posted August 6, 2016 Author Posted August 6, 2016 I'm contemplating what was I on when I wrote this o_O "It's like the number zero...It's empty, but at the same time it holds infinite possibilities." - Igor
Gentleman Jack Posted August 6, 2016 Posted August 6, 2016 Bath salts and PBR? http://i.imgur.com/FPLnAHN.jpg http://ocwfed.tv/recapppv/Award2k16/pushingthelimit.png
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