Wigging Out Seriously

[Mugen]

We open with the light from the TV reflecting onto Mugen and Emp who is wrapped up in a blanket on the couch surrounded by snacks in Mugen’s Majestic Mansion with the echoing sounds of people screaming, gunfire and explosions in the background. Emp mouths the words along with the guy on the TV “GET TO THE CHOPPA!!”

Emp: I love this movie.. Arnold is seriously such a badass in this movie. That ugly mother fucker didn’t stand a chance

 

Emp mutes the TV and looks over to Mugen who is dressed in a custom made Mac adult sized onesie and throwing popcorn into the air and attempting to catch it in his mouth.

 

She starts to imagine Mugen with his muscles rippling while dressed in military gear covered in mud and fighting off a man-hunting alien monster.

 

Mugen: Ehh he’s not so tough did you see what I did to Wrex? And don’t get me started on what I would have done to Rust Chole if I actually took him seriously.

 

Mugen eventually realizes the movie has been muted and looks over at Emp who is just dead eyed staring at him with drool dripping out of mouth.

Mugen: Are you okay? Do I have something on my face? Is it butter?

 

Mugen licks his fingers as he rubs his face trying to see if there is any butter but no luck.

He then snaps his fingers in front of Emp’s face trying to get her to snap out of it. “Hello, are you in there?” Emp blanks a few times and wipes the drool from her mouth.

Emp: So why don’t you?

 

Mugen: Why don’t I do what?

 

Emp: Why don’t you take him seriously..maybe you should be more serious. Maybe it’s time the roster starts to show Mugen...no no..P3 the respect they deserve.

 

Mugen does his best recreation of the thinking emoji and looks into the empty space above them.

Mugen: You’re right. And you know what the first step is to redoing your image and becoming more serious?

 

Emp: Hitting the gym? I’m ready.

 

Mugen: No silly.

 

Mugen reaches behind him and grabs his laptop.

Mugen: A MAKEOVER! Well specifically, NEW ATTIRE!

 

Emp: I’m not sure if that’s what I was thinking.

 

Mugen boops her on the nose.

Mugen: Boop. Come on, this is exactly what is needed. Look, I’ll even take care of you.

 

Mugen puts the computer in between them two as he starts researching ideas for is attire.

Mugen: Black and Red……..meh, done too much.

 

Emp: Way too much.

 

Mugen: White………...too messy.

 

Emp: Way too messy. Especially with all the blood.

 

Mugen and Emp are seen flipping through a few more pages before their eyes widen together looking at something but we can’t really see what it is.

Mugen: The colors………..black…………

 

Emp: And gold…………..I love gold.

 

Mugen: This is it, this is what I…..excuse me, we need as part of our makeover.

 

Emp nods as she looks at Mugen trying to picture him in the new attire. The longer she pictures this, the faster she seems to zone out.

Mugen: And now, as promised. Let’s see what we can do for you.

 

Mugen looks over at Emp and cracks an award winning smile similar to even rivaling that of Tiberius Dupree. Mugen pats her on the back, knocking her out of her dazed state of mind. Emp looks at the smile on his face and starts to get concerned.

Emp: Oh uh um, what did you have in mind?

 

Mugen grabs Emp by the arm and yanks her off the couch. The blanket as well as junk food goes flying all over the floor. Mugen drags Emp into the next room and sits her down on a salon chair.

Mugen: A fresh hairdo with a new attire will help bring out the new you… I mean us.

 

Emp rubs her buzzed head and stares at Mugen a bit confused.

Emp: I didn’t know you knew how to style hair plus, I don’t know if you noticed but I don’t really have much hair left.

 

Mugen: Oh I noticed..but don’t worry I’m not the one working on your hair.

 

Mugen claps his hands twice and almost like magic a hair stylist appears behind Emp.

Emp: What the? Where the hell did you come from?!

 

Mugen: Don’t worry this is my hair stylist. His name is Juan Caliente Sanitation

 

“JCS”: This is what you give me to work with Well, honey, I've seen worse. We're going to turn this sow's ear Into a silk purse…

Emp: Sow’s ear! Excuse me!

 

Juan slams a large case on the counter in front of Emp. He slowly opens it and starts laughing with an evil Maniacal laugh. Emp looks over at Mugen with a look of fear on her face.

Juan: Don’t move this won’t hurt a bit…..at first. Now where did I put that stapler?

 

Emp: Stapler!!??

 

Juan: Trust me darling. Let’s try this first one out.

 

Juan tosses a wig on Emp’s head and turns her around to face the mirror.

 

 

Emp: Um…………………...it’s a little too green for me?

 

Juan: Darling you right, let’s try something else.

 

Juan reaches into his case and pulls out something else that only makes Emp’s eyes widen. Juan puts it on her head and turns her towards the mirror again.

 

 

Emp: Why is there a crown built into this wig?

 

Juan: Why not darling? Simply put you are a queen and you need to know that.

 

Mugen: This is true, well spoken Juan.

 

Juan: Okay okay, last one. Let’s try this one out.

 

Juan pulls out something very extravagant and pops it on Emp’s head.

 

Emp: I literally cannot see.

 

Juan: Blocking the haters darling!

 

Mugen: Can’t let them get to you!

 

An annoyed Emp takes off the wig and throws it at Juan but as she is just about to hit him, she sees something in his case of wigs and actually looks pleased.

Emp: How about this one?

 

Without taking it out, Juan takes a look and nods.

Juan: I think that would be perfect.

 

Mugen: PERFECT! Look at that, makeover complete!

 

The scene fades out as Emp reaches into the case for the wig.