Chris Ryder Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 (edited) The scene opens with vision of cars driving by and faint chitter-chatter, the camera moves down from the view of a sunny sky, as it's revealed the location is an Airport. The camera zooms in on the main doors as they open up, Chris Ryder walks out, wheeling along his gear bag. Chris notices the camera filming him, and walks in its general direction. The look on his face shows contempt and frustration, he stops in front of the camera, places his bag next to himself and looks towards the cameraman. Chris Ryder: "Judging from the OCW T-shirt you're wearing, I assume you're here regarding Riot this past week?" The faint sound of "Yep'." is heard. Chris Ryder: "Right then. This past Tuesday was nothing more than a feeble attempt to derail the early take off of what is going to be nothing more than complete and utter dominance in Online Championship Wrestling. Cash Creed and Jaysin Sensation seem to feel that our presence on Riot this past week, would effect programming protocol, so they decided to suspend two of our group members." Chris scoffs to himself, in disgust. Chris Ryder: "This decision was a complete abuse of power, I mean the only reason we weren't all banned, was because Jacob Trance and myself were booked to be on the Show pre-Trials & Stipulations. Now let's take a look at our prestigious OCW Management for a second, we have Cash Creed: A man who's been in charge of our flag ship program for how long? A week? The thought of a man, with so much inexperience, taking charge, leads me to believe he's afraid that our group, if given the freedom, can dominate his entire Roster. "Vic Vimes? That man has fallen so far down the ladder, people are beginning to believe his hands are made of Butter and his feet are leaking elbow grease. Finally, of course, how can we forget the Boss, the Leader, Mr. J. C. Sensation. This man is worse than Vimes and Creed. Why? Because he let this injustice happen. Our group was given the boot on HIS show, and what did he do? Nothing! He sat there, in his big chair, in his office in New York, smiling most likely, as my friends were treated as minorities!" Chris look down at his bag before unzipping it and pulling out the OCW Television Championship. Chris Ryder: "The only reason I wasn't treated with such harshness! Was because I had to defend this Championship Belt! What kind of fair, impartial company, treats its employees this way?! Online Championship Wrestling." Chris slips his Television Title back into his bag, before zipping it up, and looking at the camera once more. Chris Ryder: "But I'm not worried. I am not about to blow a fuse, over such a discriminating situation. I am after all, a part of the most powerful Group that OCW has seen in years. I will take this set-back in stride, and move not forward, but upward." Chris grabs his bag handle, and looks towards the camera with a maniacal grin. Chris Ryder: "Because together, we are a new plateau of power. We ... Are APEX." Chris sneers at the cameraman, before walking out of shot. The camera moves upward to the sky, before fading to black. Edited February 5, 2011 by Chris Ryder Thanatos is a jerk. 3
Tiberius Dupree Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 it's nice to see more than rookies using the backstage. good rp ryder, hope to see more down the line. "You either die a hero or live long enough to become Nate Ortiz" - Drago Cesar "Let me make myself clear: you work for me. If I tell you to fight Blaine, you fight Blaine. Hell, if I tell you to fight a lion, you WILL fight a lion and still thank me afterwards for giving you a job." - Mr. Sensation
Thanatos Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE WITH THANATOS Airport. "AIRPORT" DOES NOT NEED TO BE CAPITALIZED AS IT IS NOT, IN THIS CONTEXT, A PROPER NOUN. The Camera zooms "CAMERA" DOES ALSO NOT NEED TO BE CAPITALIZED AS IT IS ALSO NOT, IN THIS CONTEXT, A PROPER NOUN. main-doors THIS USE OF A HYPHEN IS UNNECESSARY AND MAKES YOU LOOK LIKE A WANKER. gear-bag SEE ABOVE. DEFINITELY MAKES YOU LOOK LIKE A WANKER. the Camera "CAMERA" DOES NOT...WAIT A MINUTE. WE'VE ALREADY BEEN THROUGH THIS. walks in it's general direction THE APOSTROPHE IN THIS LINE IS ALSO UNNECESSARY; REPLACING "IT'S" WITH "IT IS" WOULD MAKE YOU SOUND LIKE AN IDIOT. the Camera WHICH, ACCORDING TO THAT MISTAKE (WHICH I HAVE NOW SEEN FOR THE THIRD TIME), WOULD NOT BE INACCURATE. the Cameraman IN FACT, I STAND BY THAT ASSERTION. THE AUTHOR OF THIS PROMO IS AN IDIOT. T-Shirt NOW, YOU MAY BELIEVE THAT MY BEEF WITH THIS ERROR IS ONE RELATED TO HYPHENS. YOU WOULD BE RETARDED, HOWEVER, TO BELIEVE THAT. "SHIRT" IS UNNECESSARILY CAPITALIZED. early-take-off YOU ARE GOING TO DIE BY OVERDOSING ON HYPHENS. Programming protocol IN CONTEXT, "PROGRAMMING" DOES NOT NEED TO BE CAPITALIZED. two of our Group members "GROUP" IS NOT A PROPER NOUN, AND THEREFORE, STOP CAPITALIZING IT AND MAKING YOURSELF LOOK FUCKING STUPID. This decision was a complete abuse of power, I mean the only reason THE ONLY REASON I'M DOING THIS IS BECAUSE YOU SUCK BALLS AT THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. THE COMMA SHOULD BE A PERIOD, AND THERE SHOULD BE A COMMA AFTER "I MEAN". I mean the only reason we weren't all banned, was because Jacob Trance THAT COMMA IS COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY. NOT TO MENTION NOTHING SHOULD EVER BE DUE TO JACOB TRANCE. FUCK THAT GUY. Now lets take a look THERE SHOULD BE AN APOSTROPHE IN "LETS", AS IN, "LET US TAKE A LOOK". INSTEAD, YOU OPTED FOR THE MORE RETARDED OPTION OF "LETS", AS IN, "LETS SUK COCKS GUYZ". at our prestigious OCW Management for a second, we have Cash Creed THE COMMA SHOULD BE REPLACED WITH EITHER A PERIOD OR A SEMI-COLON. HOWEVER, YOU PROPERLY CAPITALIZED "MANAGEMENT" AS IT IS, IN THIS CASE, INDEED A PROPER NOUN. CONGRATULATIONS! YOU'RE ONLY MOSTLY A SHIT STAIN ON THE UNDERWEAR OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. flag-ship Program A DOUBLE FUCKING WHAMMY! INCORRECT USAGE OF A HYPHEN ON TOP OF INCORRECT CAPITALIZATION. HOLY FUCKING CHOCOLATE CHRIST. The thought of a man with so much inexperience taking charge, leads me to THE THOUGHT OF A MAN MISUSING COMMAS SO MUCH LEADS ME TO WANT TO MURDER HIS FAMILY. Elbow Greece. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? Finally of course, NOT ONLY IS THIS LINE SOPHOMORIC, STUPID, AND POORLY PHRASED, YOU ARE ACTUALLY MISSING A FUCKING COMMA FOR ONCE. IT GOES AFTER "FINALLY". This man is worse than Vimes and Creed, why? IS IT BECAUSE THERE IS A COMMA WHERE THERE SHOULD BE A PERIOD? OR IS IT BECAUSE YOU'RE USING HYPOPHORA AS A LITERARY TECHNIQUE? BOTH ARE GROUNDS FOR BEING CHOKESLAMMED. smiling most likely; as my friends were treated THIS IS A TEXTBOOK EXAMPLE OF JUVENILE AND IDIOTIC MISUSE OF A SEMI-COLON. PLEASE EAT A DICK AS YOU REPLACE IT WITH A COMMA. as Minorities! "MINORITIES" IS NOT A PROPER NOUN. OH, AND THIS IS PRETTY FUCKING RACIST. Chris look down at his bag, before unzipping it YOU DON'T NEED TO USE A COMMA BEFORE YOU UNZIP YOUR BAG. AT LEAST, I DON'T. MIGHT BE DIFFERENT FOR YOUR KIND. RETARDS, THAT IS. The only reason I wasn't treated with such harshness! Was because I had to defend this Championship Belt! OH, I SEE! SO NOW WE! ARE TALKING LIKE THIS! AND EMPHASISING! RANDOM PARTS OF! OUR SPEECH! YOU FUCKING RETARD! impartial Company WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS, MAN. treats it's employees BUT REALLY, WHAT WAS I TO EXPECT? Chris slips his Television Title back into his bag, before zipping it up, and looking at the Camera once more. IF I SEE THAT FUCKING CAPITALIZED "CAMERA" ONE MORE TIME... blow a Fuse OH. I SEE. SWITCH IT UP ON OL' THANATOS, HE WON'T NOTICE THAT YOU INCORRECTLY CAPITALIZED A DIFFERENT WORD. EAT A DICK, CLOWN. over such a discriminating situation, I am after all, a part of the THE FIRST COMMA IS SO FUCKING WRONG IT MAKES ME WANT TO STAB YOU IN THE EYE WITH IT. most powerful Group that OCW has seen in years. I will take this set-back in stride, and move not forward, but upward. THIS EXCERPT IS LIKE A MONTAGE VIDEO TO EVERYTHING THAT WENT HORRIBLY AND COMPLETELY WRONG IN THIS PROMO. Chris grabs his Bag handle "BAG" IS NOT A PROPER FUCKING NOUN! KNOCK THAT SHIT OFF RIGHT THIS INSTANT! the Camera MURDER. DEATH. KILL. we are a new Plateau of power. IT'S NOT A FUCKING PROPER NOUN, YOU ABSOLUTE CUNT. We, are APEX YOU WILL WAKE UP ONE MORNING, LYING ON A COLD STEEL TABLE. YOUR HANDS AND FEET ARE BOUND, AND YOUR MOUTH HAS BEEN TAPED. IT IS DARK, AND YOU CANNOT SEE A THING. YOUR BODY FLOWS WITH PAIN, THOUGH THE SOURCE OF WHICH IS UNKNOWN. THEN, SUDDENLY, THE LIGHTS COME UP. AS YOUR EYES STRUGGLE TO COPE WITH THE PIERCING BRIGHTNESS, YOU ARE ABLE TO MAKE OUT THE HUNDREDS OF COMMAS THAT HAVE PIERCED EVERY SQUARE INCH OF YOUR BODY. Cameraman NO. off-screen I'M DONE. The Camera FUCK OFF AND DIE.i 4
Useless Dane Xavier Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 Thanatos, you two have no lives. http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g289/jlethridge1/DaneCard.jpg http://wrestlinglol.com/photos/14n34sp.gif
Thanatos Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY "YOU TWO"? I AM THANATOS, AND THANATOS IS I. THERE IS NO "SPLIT PERSONALITY" BULLSHIT GOING ON IN HERE, IF THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE REFERRING TO. i
Tiberius Dupree Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY "YOU TWO"? I AM THANATOS, AND THANATOS IS I. THERE IS NO "SPLIT PERSONALITY" BULLSHIT GOING ON IN HERE, IF THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE REFERRING TO. i I think your cap button is stuck, might wanna have someone check that out for u. "You either die a hero or live long enough to become Nate Ortiz" - Drago Cesar "Let me make myself clear: you work for me. If I tell you to fight Blaine, you fight Blaine. Hell, if I tell you to fight a lion, you WILL fight a lion and still thank me afterwards for giving you a job." - Mr. Sensation
Thanatos Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 YOU MIGHT WANT SOMEONE TO CHECK OUT YOUR ASS, BECAUSE IT'S GOING TO HAVE MY FOOT UP IT IN A MOMENT. i
Trevor McManus Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 YOU MIGHT WANT SOMEONE TO CHECK OUT YOUR ASS, BECAUSE IT'S GOING TO HAVE MY FOOT UP IT IN A MOMENT. i "You" is unnecessarily capitalised. "Might" is unnecessarily capitalised. "Want" is unnecessarily capitalised. Etc. http://positivesharing.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/08/complaining.jpg [23:39] locoNY911: You get solace in the fact you arent a fuck up. 2k9's better than 2k8. Like being shot in the knee is better than being shot in the head. - Guy Fausto [18:40] locoNY911: I mostly aggree with your statements
Heaton Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 Trevor, why am I not surprised to find you, of all people, making fun of poor Thanatos' verbal tic? Racist. http://i175.photobucket.com/albums/w157/HEATONLOL/Sephiroth01.gif Haters Gonna Hate
Chris Ryder Posted February 5, 2011 Author Posted February 5, 2011 THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE WITH THANATOS http://www.heahea.org/img/636/U_mad.jpg Seriously-Though, Thank You; For The! Feedback.
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