Justin Rockstar

NANI? NEEDS MORE ROX! Hit me up brahhhhhh!

Only way I'll ever gain weight to get into the heavyweight division... *smacks belly* Is this right here.

The X-Tron flickers on, showing Justin Rockstar's face with a microphone held to it. The audience pops for the appearance of the veteran rocknrolla. Justin Rockstar: Ladies and gentlemen... and ladies... of Havanna, Cuba! Welcome to the Asylum! The audience becomes louder for the mention of their home location. Justin Rockstar: Tonight, just like every night, is going to be another rockin' party! But on this night, at this event, the party gets bigger, and it don't get bigger than chopping a resident Angry Black Man down to size baybay! Justin Rockstar: You see, I know the number one weakness of all these big bumbling stumbling slowpokes that stomp around OCW. With a little bit of passion and a lot a bit of my favorite girl Angie, I will run circles around that ugly dope whose having a gay love affair with the Riot GM, Mr. Reese. Justin Rockstar: And I get it K.Dongle, I really do. It's 2012, you're entitled to love whoever and whatever you want to love. Whether it be a horse, another man, a blowup doll or what have you. Just... do us all a favor and keep it to yourself, write him a letter or something. Justin Rockstar: Do you know what I love? I love living on the edge, I love a good ol' fashion adrenaline rush. I love traveling around the world and entertaining ALLLLLLLLL of the Rock City fans! Another cheap pop. Justin Rockstar: But the one thing I don't love or care for at all is a man who is green with envy and imitates pathetically. The man who I'm talking about is Johnny Phoenix, yes I finally learned his name. Justin Rockstar: In my absence, I've indulged in watching Riot and saw this punk with a period stain streaked through his hair, thinking he's a rebel. Thinking that smoking a cigarette makes him edgy and cool. Johnny boy, I've been smoking cigarettes before smoking was cool, which in retrospect makes me like ninety years old but nonetheless! Justin Rockstar: You're just jealous of my lifestyle and wish you had an ounce the personality that I have. So you decide to hit your little finisher on me and walk away from the match on Riot, letting DJ Pauly D pick up his debut victory. I thought that was just Johnny being emo Johnny, until I heard what he had to say once he got backstage... Justin Rockstar: Half of it I had no idea what you were talking about, and the other half I don't even remember, but all I know is you sounded like a beached jelly fish, laying limp like the impotent emofag you are... can I say emofag on television? No? Well I just did! Justin Rockstar: Johnny, I suggest you stay out of my way, because if you don't, you'll just end up Dazed & Confused! The Ayatolah raises the microphone and releases it. It falls to the ground and feedback comes though the speakers. He walks out of frame as the scene fades.

I was just on it reversal wise in that match, and capitalizing on my reversals. As for the size of my head, it's mah sexay hair, my big sexay hair. I'll make some adjustments.

What match are you watching? I think you need to go back and see what you missed. I... I still can't believe... Why would he do that?

Yes, yes. Brilliant. /strokes cat like an evil person.

The camera fades in on Dr. Lassiter, sitting at his desk in his office and palming his face. His two assistants sit in chairs on the opposite side of the desk. Dr. Lassiter: I just don't know what to do! There's no way Dane is going to be able to find someone to be able to snap my patient out of his vegetative state! I'm doomed, doomed I tell you! Assistant #1: We'll figure something out, don't worry James. Assistant #2: Yeah, everything's going to be just fine. Dr. Lassiter shakes his head. Dr. Lassiter: I need to relax... The doctor reaches underneath his desk and pulls out a bottle of gin and a shot glass. He opens the bottle and begins to pour but nothing comes out. He looks into the bottle before throwing it across the room. The bottle smashes against the wall and pieces scatter across the floor. Assistant #1: Calm down James, remember your blood pressure. The second assistant stands up and walks over to a shelf, pulls down a box labeled "Ethridge" rifles through it and pulls out a ziplock bag of green stuff. ;) He then walks over to Dr. Lassiter's desk and puts the bag on the desk. Assistant #2: Here, we confiscated this from your patient the day you brought him in. A very small smile comes over Lassiter's face as he reaches for the bag and brings it closer. He opens his desk drawer and pulls out a tobacco pipe and loads it with some of the green stuff. He then sparks it up and takes a good puff of smoke and exhales with a coughing fit. The smoke dances all over the room. The camera begins following a flurry of smoke that goes out the door and dances down the hall past one door, then another, and another, and another, until the flurry of smoke finally enters underneath a door labeled 429 and the camera continues to follow it (it's a really small camera that's controlled remotely, duh). We are now inside a small padded room where Justin Ethridge sits in isolation with his straightjacket and restraint mask firmly secured. The string of smoke floats its way toward Justin before disappearing up his nose and the camera zooms in on him. Justin's left eye begins to twitch uncontrollably for a minute, but soon stops. The camera fades.

The church setup enters the room and I'M FUCKING ROLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY LAWD DEAR SAVIOR!

The following video was mailed to OCW HQ with a note attached labeled "not for the faint of heart." A webcam flickers on and shows Dr. James Lassiter, an old white-haired man in glasses and a shirt-tie-lab coat combo. He adjusts the webcam and clears his throat. Dr. Lassiter: Tuesday, August 2nd, 2011. We have performed many reflex tests on the comatose patient, Mr. Justin Ethridge, also known as Justin Rockstar... Dr. Lassiter adjusts the camera to show The Rockstar sitting and being tested on by Dr. Lassiter's assistants. His hair is a mess and dirty as he hasn't been bathed in weeks. He is dressed in only a pair of boxers as one of the assistants begins to take a blow torch to his leg. The other assistant looks at the wild brain reflex patterns on a computer monitor and takes notes. Dr. Lassiter: We have even begun to take extreme measures as you can clearly see, and his body shows no reflex or reaction whatsoever. As time has progressed, his brain reflex patterns have grown more rapidly and it's the scariest thing I've ever seen. I-- Suddenly, Justin lets out a blood curdling scream. Dr. Lassiter spins around to observe the scene. Rockstar backhands the assistant that is using a blow torch on him. The assistant hits the floor, knocked out cold as the blow torch lands near The Rockstar. He frantically picks up the blow torch as the other assistant begins to near him but he's held back by Rockstar, holding the blow torch to him as if it were a gun. Justin Rockstar: Get back! I'm not afraid to hurt you back! The assistant raises his hands in the air in surrender. Dr. Lassiter: Mr. Ethridge... please calm down, you're in shock! The Rockstar quickly turns to look at Dr. Lassiter. He drops the blow torch and lunges at the doctor. He takes him down and begins to choke him. Justin Rockstar: You want to cause me pain, do ya? The pain I'll cause you will make you wish you were dead! Just then, two security guards come in the room and apprehend Justin. He struggles to get loose but fails. Dr. Lassiter staggers to his feet and adjusts his glasses. Dr. Lassiter: Put a straightjacket and a restraint mask on him and throw him in the padded cell! We're not nearly done with him! As the security guards take Rockstar away, Dr. Lassiter takes a seat back in front of his webcam, obviously shaken. Dr. Lassiter: Phase one of our tests are a success. Now on to phase two. The webcam cuts off on the smirking face of Dr. Lassiter.

Many people have been wondering why Justin Rockstar hasn't been on OCW television much lately... well no one's been wondering, but that's not the point. After End Games, The Rockstar overdosed on cocaine and was checked into a hospital by an OCW employee that would like to remain anonymous. As soon as Justin checked out of the hospital, OCW officials emplored him to check himself into rehab as they can't face him to do so. He realized that he had a problem and checked himself into a rehab center in his home town of Atlanta, Georgia but was still allowed to compete under the eye of one Dr. James Lassiter. Last week, The Rockstar was supposed to face rookie Vernon Pryce but was no where to be found. Eventually, OCW officials found Justin sitting in his hotel room with a glazed over look in his eyes but was unresponsive when they called out his name and waved their hand in front of his face. Justin Rockstar is now under the care of Dr. James Lassiter who had the following to say: "I've never seen anything like this in my forty plus years of medical study. He acts as if he is brain dead but his brain patterns show normal activity. I've run a series of reflex tests on him that have resulted in groundbreaking results... his brain reacts but his body does not..." More on this as news becomes available.

So Mr. Pryce removed me from his friends list. I'm assuming either he forgot who I am or because of that fact and the fact that he hasn't been on the site lately, I'm sadly assuming he won't be competing in OCW. I'll have a backup match just in case, but this honestly and truly saddens me.

OCW Riot, where money talks and bullshit walks. The bullshit is that I didn't know that rule! That's okay, because I know something no one else seems to know! Except for Matsuda maybe.

Was the ending to my match legal? Because as far as I knew YOU had to hit a finisher before ending the match, no matter what kind of match.

So what is LOTUS supposed to be, this perfect machine? You can't have the same thing happening every single week, eventually it needs to be known that LOTUS is in fact human and they're going to make mistakes, and at this point they need to take the time to realize that someone's bound to be crazy enough to go balls to the walls at them. They didn't expect me to come out there and they had no thought in their minds that I'd attack! I caught LOTUS off guard, but did little to no damage to those three people, because as soon as I got out of the ring they were on my ass! I have the brain damage, the concussion, the madness in me as my permanent scar given to me by LOTUS. A couple of weeks ago they did permanent damage to me that could have ended my career! This week they walked away without so much as a scratch on them, maybe their ego took a hit but that's about it. This week I was pissed off, I didn't care what happened when I climbed into that ring, whether I was put in a coma or I came away successful, and the end result was very gratifying.

*in Macho Man's voice* A lesson to be learned young Cody Storm. When someone decides to come and try to take away what you care about the most, sometimes you have to rely on a little extra, oh yeah. You know what I'm talkin about Mean Gene? I'm talkin about THE MADNESS YEAH! And when you walk that aisle you know that there's no turnin back yeah, because the moment you turn your back you turn your back on the fans, and to make sure I didn't have the lightest thought of doing that I had Angie by my side every step of the way OH YEAH! Because with Angie and with the madness, there is no stoppin you YEAH! Sometimes you need to get funky like a monkey and give it your all to show that darkness that they've crossed paths with the wrong guy YEAH! It's ROCKSTAR MADNESS!