The Steve

http://4funz.com/Funny-Pictures/memes/other/img-an-hero-2-113

Jookie - FFS, it's 'deez nutz'. Reese - The fuck?

Wrestlers from that era were big into cocaine and other assorted 'medication'. The Steve approves of this signing.

Bitch, please. The Steve was smokin' dope when you were diapers.

Final page ----------- • Looks like fat fat fattie couldn’t wait. • Just what we need, a bunch of ghetto-ass n….. Sorry, that is not The Steve, that was The Steve’s father talking. The Steve is not like that, The Steve votes Democrat. We cool? • You think these kids know who Don Imus is? I’d be amazed if they knew who Michael Richards was. • It’s a Little Critters title match. How many JoMo moves are we going to see in this one? • The Steve said this once, and he’ll say it again…no one loves Hazard. • Nice dropdown & hurricanrana spot. • Hostile connecting with JoMo move #1. • Ugh, more plunder? The Steve would rather see flippy flippy moves than more plunder. • TWOOOO!!1!!11!!! • Hazard botches JoMo move #2 of the match. • Hazard eats a pair of knees for JoMo move #3. • 4. Record is 5. • Both miss their JoMo spots…count ‘em, 5 and 6. • Lulz on Hazard’s miss for number 7. • Low blow into a superkick…1 – 2 – 3. Hostile retains. (Pretty good main event. Looked like Hostile had to come back to win that one.)

Page 4 -------- • Looks like Leon is a touch butthurt after losing to Smythe. • WTF is ‘kingdom minded’? • The white RD? • Yea, The Steve can unfortunately smell it. You should have dropped a deuce before heading to the ring, you sick fuck. • Ah, it’s another guy that has never defeated The Steve. • Holy shit, shut the fuck up and get on with it. • Oh shit…Vinnie has a shooty shoot moment. Thanks for the props, BTW. • The Steve’s brain hurts after hearing that backstory on the title. • That was an interesting little segment. Leon, sorry but Dane is way more verbose than you. • What is a Serpent Series? • Jay, can you get the in-house sound guy to make Crowe new entrance music? • Eww…Crowe gets a face full of sweaty balls. • Dupree misses JoMo spot #1 of the match. • Crowe completely whiffs on the dive to the outside…ouch. • Dupree’s Pescado barely grazes Crowe, but Crowe sells it anyway. 10 bucks says this clip makes it on the next Botchamania. • Dupree again misses on a JoMo spot. That makes two. • WTF is going on with the camera? I don’t know what Jay is doing, but he needs to have a talk with his production staff. • Crowe with a missed JoMo spot of his own. Up to three, now. • Yea…plunder time. /s • Bloom? Really…REALLY? • (Good match by both guys. Let’s see where this Bloom thing goes…)

Page 3 ----- • Somebody in the production truck fucked up. Someone is getting fired. • Nate? Bleh. Fun fact, The Steve has never lost to Nate Ortiz. Closest he came was a 1-1 draw…thanks again, Guy. • DIGGS! Still rockin’ the dreads? You haven’t beaten The Steve either, FYI. • You’re not The Steve’s hero. The Steve is The Steve’s hero. He should be your hero, too. • People bow to you? Lord fucking Shark? WTF? • The Steve was never long winded…he was just too high to form complete sentences. • ‘I Wish I Was Nate Ortiz’ v. a fat fuck for the main event…because fat fucks equals ratings. • OCW’s resident rapist is now raping my eyes with his presence…MAKE IT STOP! • He’s a homersexual rapist, I see. • It all makes sense now…D-Jack is Shannon Moore. • You’re just a big bully…call the whaaambulance. • (I’m really digging Jookie’s intro.) • That’s it. Too many people smoke weed. The Steve is making a one off appearance. The Steve is going to host in the middle of the ring, a smoke off between the noob smokers, Spoon...who is the only one that can make this a contest, and The Steve. The Steve will be damned if he has to start crushing up and snorting vicodins just to set himself apart. • Gentleman’s challenge? Sounds gay. • Up next, Leon v. Smythe…er, Jookie. • Leon gets lucky with the JoMo spot to the outside. • I liked that leapfrog spot. • The ref needs glasses. How does he not stop Leon when his feet are on the ropes. • (Both guy’s moveset definitely fit each character.) • After being dominated, Jookie is starting to make a comeback. • Holy shit! Didn’t see that finish coming (very solid and fun match to watch).

Page 2... ----- • Mmmm, azn girls. I have a rufie colada with her name all over it. • It was fun, with the rest of ToP, fucking with Stacy back in the day. • Uh oh, we got a pissed off azn. • How did Stacy get out there so fast? • K. Dangelo arrives in the ‘I have a small penis’-mobile. Real men drive Vespas. • Gospel? Easy listening? I’m revoking your man card. • Did he just say iceberg lettuce? • Lotta Black Rackin’ gonna be done. Is that like a Cleveland Steamer? • He’s religious? • That Family Guy reference is still funny. • That segment must have been a pre-tape, because there is no way one gets ring ready in 30 seconds…that also explains how Stacy got out there so fast, but I digest – it’s match time. • I thought he said he wasn’t into rap? • Oh for fuck’s sake Braddock, what did you do to yourself? • Yea, Iceberg lands some offense…at the 5 minute mark. • Nice reversal of the spear, Iceberg. (K. Dangelo, no offense but you’re too big to be doing spears IMO). • …and mercifully, it ends (K. Dangelo dominates in this one as Iceberg really couldn’t get it going). • Dupree goes the Fat Hardy route and has his own show. Will Dupree also get arrested 4 times in under 30 days like Fat Hardy, too? Let’s find out… • Canucks like dirty whores, too. Who knew? • I wonder what’s written on those other post-its? • Who is Dorian, and how does he have the money to afford such things as luxury boxes, champagne, and whores? • Azn v. Azn – why am I in the mood for a sushi roll? • (Whoever recorded/edited, if you can, try to lower the entrance music volume and give your voice some reverb. IMO, that would make the whole thing sound even better.) • Weapons already? I was expecting some puro goodness. • I’ll take that back, as that sitout facebuster on to the chair looked like it hurt. • JoMo spot #1…botch. • Matsuda gives new meaning to ‘suicide dive’. • A Falcon Arrow on the floor, roll him back in, 1 – 2 – 3 (decent plunder match…couple of nice looking moves on to a chair).

I stand by my statement.

Lulz. I got nothin'...

You were rockin' what looked to me as frosted tips. Very '00 of you. :p I call every top rope move a John Morrison (JoMo) move, because he did them with such frequency, and usually for no reason whatsoever. In all seriousness, don't change anything due to my ball busting. If I see a lot of technical moves and whatnot, I'll be poking at that, too (even though The Steve is Mr. Technical).

I’m just gonna make a list of the things that catch my eye and other random thoughts as I watch the show, as opposed to writing a lengthy review. Think of this as a Twitter feed, if you will (and don’t get offended at what I say, I’m just busting balls)… • Nice opening segment by Leon & Aries. It definitely caught me up on what’s happening in the angle. Leon is a verbose mofo. • Family Guy reference by Poling and Scaggs is win. • 2 RP’s in a row mentioning the goddamn iPhone? Do y’all work for Apple or something? Shit… • Jesus Christ…does everyone smoke pot now? Remember kids, The Steve and Versus did it first, and did it better than you kiddies. • Omar – ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER…DO YOU SPEAK IT? • Lakers suck, that is all. • I see Pugh uses the same hairdresser Michael Cole used to back in the day. • Pugh with the first JoMo spot of the night, and early. • Omar just keeps hitting Pugh with bomb move after bomb move. • Pugh shoulder blocks Omar into the announce table (which looked great), but follows it up with JoMo spot #2. :( • OHNOEZ! Announce table shenanigans are about to happen… • Cee Lo Green is just…awful. • Pugh, that’s the third time you got caught in the Lou Thesz press. Stop running! • Pugh misses JoMo spot #3 and ends his hope sequence. • RD Money is gonna be pissed about that near fall. • Is that the BWO theme? • Pugh HITS JoMo spot #4…not even a 1 count? Boo. • Omar loves that Belly-to-Belly slam. 1 – 2 – kickout. TWOOOO!!! • That’s 4 of those Pugh. I told you how to remedy that. • That’s 2 powerbombs and still no pin? Damn, Pugh got some heart…or some drugs. • 5 • BAH GAWD, OMAR KILLED HIM!! 1 – 2 – 3 (Solid opener. Was rooting for Pugh, as he took a lot of damage early. Omar looks strong.) • Mr. Poling agrees with me. • Barker talks shit to a guy who just got beat in the ring, and has to name drop to boot. Classy. I blame the parents. • I think Judy says it best… "Right, you do realize you're mentally retarded, don't you?" • I just noticed, aren’t we due for a commercial break? • Booker? • No one loves Hazard. • Goldberg? • No Spoon? This show sucks now. I’ll try to do a page or two of the show a day in this format. Only have time for one today. I’m kinda having fun reviewing it this way, so let me know if you like this format or not.

Why can't I see the first 3 videos on page 1?

Great first show of the year. I'm not really able to give any in depth reviews, as it's been a couple years since I watched a show, so I gotta learn all the new characters. Favorite match was Matsuda v. LSD...fur coats and headers into tables equals win.

Someone should buy the game for The Steve so he can show you how reversing is done.

The Steve exits the front door of his North Carolina home, carrying a suitcase and a large duffel bag. He walks over to his car and pops the trunk and places the bags in the trunk. Before he closes it, he unzips the duffel bag and pulls out a plastic case, approximately the size of a pack of cigarettes. He zips the bag up, closes the trunk, walks over to the driver’s side door and enters the driver’s seat. Once inside the car, The Steve pulls a joint from the case he retrieved from the duffel bag and a lighter and lights up the joint. After a few tokes, he starts the car and pulls out of the driveway. After a couple miles of driving and smoking, The Steve pulls out his phone and makes a phone call. Unknown Person: Who is this? The Steve: It’s Steve. Unknown Person: Steve who? The Steve: The Steve, you fool! Unknown Person: Got no time for love, Dr. Jones. The Steve: Clerks…yea, I get it. Are you busy, dude? Dude: What’s with this ‘I’ sh*t? The Steve: Am I in front of a packed arena or on camera? Use your head, dude. Anyway, I have a favor to ask ya. Dude: It’s been 2 years and not even a ‘how ya doin’? I’m hurt. The Steve: Fine. How ya been? Dude: Oh, you know…same ol’, same ol’. How about you? Where have you been hiding since retirement? The Steve: I moved to North Carolina, near the ocean. I’m living in a golf community now. Dude: Golf!? Seriously? Are you 50 years old already? The Steve: Yea, you’re funny. I’m tellin’ ya, nothing beats a blunt or 5 and 18 holes, then heading to the beach to relax ya. Dude: Whatever man. You stick to that old fogey game. Anyway, what favor did you need? The Steve: I’m going to be in the area next week and I’m gonna need some supplements. Think you could help me out? Dude: Sure...what you need? I’ve got Andro, Fluoxymesterone, Oxymetholone, HGH…whatever you need. The Steve: Not those supplements, tool. I’ve never done ‘roids, and never will. I’m talking about grass. Dude lets out a sheepish laugh. Dude: Oh yea. How much you need? The Steve: A QP probably. Dude: Consider it done. By the way, why are you coming back up here? There ain’t sh*t up here. The Steve: Well, I’m getting the itch, so I'm thinking of pulling a Jericho. But if I’m gonna do that, I need to get back into shape. Greg opened a new school in Irondequoit called Upstate Wrestling Academy, so I’m gonna let him whoop my ass until the rust is gone. Dude: Sounds like…well, hell. More power to ya. I gotta get goin’, so call me when you’re in town and I’ll arrange a drop. The Steve: Sounds good, man. I’ll talk to ya then. Later. The Steve hits end on the phone and puts it back in his pocket, and continues driving up I-95 as he mutters to himself... The Steve: It's a good thing he has great pot, 'cause he's an idiot.

Bullshit! Last time I 'stepped up' to Jay, I got hit with banstick.

Truth be told, I just started watching the PPV. I relied on one of the spoilers as I was writing the RP...to my detriment it seems.

A man wearing tan baggy cargo pants and a black hoodie is walking down a dimly lit hallway in what seems his home. Decorating the hallway are framed pictures of famous OCW matches and stars, and a few title belts; the OCW NA Championship, the OCW Television Championship, the OCW Tag Team Championship, and right below that the WWO Tag Team Championship. At the end of the hallway, the man enters the living room and proceeds to reach into his pocket and pull out his pack of Camels non-filters and a lighter, toss them onto the coffee table, then sits down on the couch. After he sits down, he reaches for the remote control that sits atop the coffee table in front of him. With the remote he turns on the 72 inch HDTV and his DVR box. Once on he goes through the menus until he reaches Wrestlution 6, and hits play. Then he opens the small chest, also on the table, and pulls out a joint. Over the next 3 and a half hours, the man watches the PPV and smokes joints and cigarettes. He seems to be enjoying what he sees...RD Money's return, the Future Investment match, Sensation losing the company to Smythe DaWonder, and the other matches and promos. As the PPV ends, the man reaches for the remote once more and turns off the DVR box and changes the setting on the television to play videos from his laptop. Putting the remote back on the table, he then opens up his laptop and pulls up a video to watch. After a few seconds, the television screen begins showing the Future Investment match from Wrestlution 1. The man once again reaches for another joint, and sparks it up. After a few hits the man mumbles to himself..."There's not enough drugs in OCW like there used to be."

The greatest finisher name ever in OCW is 'The Steve'...don't ever forget that, man who has yet to defeat The Steve. :cool:

I think you got a hold of my special stash there, son, because you must be on some serious drugs to think that.

I can't believe you let it come to this Sensation, you hot headed Hispanic. I have faith though that you will pull through in the end...and if not, you can always hire The Steve to get your revenge, since Mr. DaWonder has yet to defeat The Steve.

A card without The Steve, is no card indeed. In all seriousness, good luck in your respective matches.

A minute and a half into it and you're talking about you damn eyebrows? Get to the point already! Turn off the damn music...you might not get so distracted. How would you know anything about 'the sticks'? All you use is a keyboard. I could still 'The Steve' you, then slap on 'The Steve' and make you tap...and I've been retired for over a year. Youtube tags....come find me, bitch! You should have come to my server instead.

Thanks for the birthday wishes, guys.