Reality Check

[Dylan Graves]

Here's the deal, B-17:

 

I'm glad you're annoyed. Your emotions are your problem, not mine...but your fear in particular is shining through. Just try not to start stuttering and shaking the next time I walk into the locker room. You're right, a letter like this is a bit old fashioned. I wouldn't expect anything less from you though. The B-17 is an old-fashioned aircraft. There's a word to describe it, obsolete. No one has actually used one of those things since the late 60's...especially for battle, & they're just too brittle nowadays. Besides, nearly 50 years of innovation means the "flying fortress" just isn't that impressive of a war machine in today's world. Park it in a hanger, sell it to a collector, it's time to move on.

 

Try to keep up, I'll break this down Barney-style so you can understand it; try not to take too much of it personally.

 

Since the moment I stepped foot into OCW, I've been telling folks that you're not championship material. That's not just because I don't like you. You don't have the heart, or the work ethic to be Turmoil's Champion. Your silly letter is a perfect example of why I say that. No, I haven't noticed that your hands are full at all. Let me tell you what I (and the rest of the OCW community) have noticed: Last week at Certified Greatness, you were in the ring with me. Tank was nowhere to be found, now was he? That means, a week ago...the mighty RE-134a wouldn't have even been on the PPV card unless the Dinger and I showed up on the roster looking for a fight. You're welcome for that, otherwise you'd have been like every other B-17...grounded and watching from home. Tell me again, how important are you. You feel that? It's pride, kid. Don't let it get the best of you.

 

As far as Tank is concerned, of course I haven't missed Tank...he's our champion. I'm smart enough to steer clear of him. I know I'm not in his league right now. I know my place, it's you who insists you belong at the top despite the fact that most times you get booked in a main event...you stink the joint out and end up with another tally in the "L" column. Your desperation is stifling. As a matter of a fact, without your "drunk best friend" Jackson, you would've gotten your butt beaten at CG as well. All the highlights of our match seem to show B-17 waiting patiently on the apron, like a good boy. You're more like Jackson's little brother honestly. Sure, he takes you to some cool places. But, your ass always has to wait in the car!

 

Goodness, there's masked bad guys and Daryl is being a meany? Get over yourself.

 

You're too delusional to realize you're not nearly as important as you think you are. You're not busy, preoccupied with Tank, you're stressed...the sad story of a man with potential who cracked before he reached the top. You're tired, you're nervous. You haven't made it anywhere in OCW and you're already caving to the pressure? That's why you're not championship material and the roster can see it from a mile away.

 

A dozen more men, none of them named after an ancient aircraft, may hold that belt before you even realize I'm right.

 

You don't want me to look sideways at you anymore? I don't even know what that means, so...I'll try this. I'm staring you right straight in the eye. Why? Don't flatter yourself. You're nothing to behold, nor are you something to fear. The world sees it every time Turmoil airs.

 

Let me show you how a man, real championship material responds to a challenge.

 

You want to use this as an opportunity to get your friends booked? I'll play along. I have nothing but respect for Loki. Put him in the ring with me, my hand will be in the air at the end. If Axton wants some, he can come walking down that aisle...but he better remember is a long walk back to the locker room in defeat. Then, after that...no excuses. I will have played your game...beaten your friends...then I'm going to beat you.

[B-17]

How is it that Tank is out of your league but I beat him to propel him into the title picture and I'm a choker?

[B-17]

Obsolete my ass. You want to parade technology as the great evolution but essentially you forget what technology truly does. It renders the men, once in full control, to that of children toting guns. Technology has limited us to grasp our truest potential. I flew the modern war machines, it was always shared control. Hated it.

 

There is a reason B-17s still remain the symbol of American power and determination. Because in WWII you sent the man to do the work. Now we send the computer.

[Jackson Montgomery]

There is a reason B-17s still remain the symbol of American power and determination. Because in WWII you sent the man to do the work. Now we send the computer.

 

Damnit! Now there's a tear in my beer! 'MERICA!

[Pugh]

I'm only in this thread because Jackson posted here and lit up my orange lucha.

[Illuminati]

You know, a year after my graduation I recall a certain someone writing a letter to another certain someone on the boards and it was and quite possibly still is the funniest thing I've seen in my years on this site. I'm glad this open letter didn't end up like that one. I hope you savages rip eachothers faces off.

[Pugh]

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