Jacob Trance

Sorry I was living dangerously and live typing a promo into the submissions forum. ------------------------ Can't say I'm a fan of KC Barrett being manipulated by my shitty former brother-in-law, I'd like to have thought my bastard son was smarter than that... Must have got it from a stupid woman or something. DNS are everywhere and I hope they stick around if any of them wind up getting the ass muffin treatment. I love their moving parts that could all become tag teams and perhaps challenge. I spent more than 8 seconds on this so fuck it. I will always love everything Ry does, even when it's straight up stupid, they put in so much great content that's just... It hits. Even if Marissa's assets cost her the match against Sue. MASS EFFECT REPRESENT. Another THICK addition to the tag division.

Wish he euthanised you.

El Parca is the bad guy, he always is. That's why he hides behind a mask like a bitch coward.

Good.

Through the curtain comes an intense Mark Reese, wild eyed but also seemingly pleased with himself. Jim Black approaches. Black: Mark... Strong actions tonight, but does... Reese: Let me stop you there Jim... It doesn't end, it doesn't make me feel better... I had nothing, not a thing, not a damn thing against Harvey Hamilton Ocean. He's just the guy in the background, mindin' his own business. Kassidy Hayes... I said it myself weeks ago we never had no problems... Reese scowls. Reese: Then he made some. You can run, you can hide, you can bring out your neck brace, all of y'all's stupid minions... But I will catch up to you. When I get my hands on you Kass... Heck... Maybe they'll induct you into the hall of fame earlier than we all thought... Reese glowers. Reese: Because I have never, ever, wanted to set out just to hurt another man in that ring... But you're no man... You're nothing more than a rat... As Reese is talking Quartz' music comes to an end. In the background Kasstianity can be heard making yet another entrance. Reese: If you'll excuse me Jim... I got some huntin' to do... Reese goes to depart, making a beeline for the gorilla position only to be met by an ensemble of police officers. Reese stares them down, before departing, not wanting to be arrested.

Fantastic walk through of the wordz. I'll hopefully be able to do a text reply once the weekend calms down.

Stay gone you nobody!

May his next shit be a hedgehog.

The vibrant hum of a guitar's overdrive crashes through the speakers, a much larger crowd than usual greets the act. Out onto stage struts Jordan Trance, warning the crowd up with the first few bars of Jurassic Park. Jordan: Ladies, gentlemen and all the other good people… Thank you for waiting tonight, we had a few teething problems because you guys are so freaking rad we oversold tickets! We are FREELORDSHARK, now let’s get this started! The drummer fires right into it, opening with the hard hitting beats the audience has come to expect. Twenty minutes later Jordan wipes sweat off of his brow. Jordan: Thanks again for coming tonight. We’re going to finish it up with a cover song, a cover of a band that was very influential to me growing up and… Hold on. The Jurassic Park theme belts out from Jordan’s pocket as he receives a text. In a rush he pulls it out. Jordan: It’s from John Carter! Do you guys wanna hear it? The crowd give a mixed reaction, causing Jordan to laugh. Jordan: I thought you guys would be like that, but let’s do it anyway. “Jordan, be careful, I saw some weird stuff on Reddit about your gig tonight, I think it might be the… Jordan trails off in something of a panic as the crowd opens up slightly revealing his Hall of Fame father, Jacob Trance is in attendance. He gives a brief applause towards his son causing a glimmer of a smile across Jordan’s face. Jordan: This is our last song, this is The Plot to Bomb the Panhandle… I’VE LEARNED TO LET GO! The song gets going and Jordan loses himself in the moment, forgetting entirely what’s going on. Jordan: I’m looking down at this mess that you’ve made, and I can’t believe that I stayed, unhappy for so long, where did I go wrong? Jordan looks up and waves during the lyric towards his father: Goodbye for a lifetime. Jacob smirks and the sound of screaming fills the venue as KC runs onto the stage, brandishing a whiskey bottle. Swiftly he smashes it over Jordan’s head as he turns to see what’s going on, the screaming escalates as he brandishes the broken bottle towards the rest of the band. Audience members begin streaming out of the building as Jacob climbs onto the stage, sitting beside his son, cradling his bleeding head. Jacob: It’s such a shame you won’t be able to make Friday night now Jordan… Don’t worry though, I’m sure the hotel room will be able to let you watch as we dismantle your friends on television. You never were my favourite son, I didn’t even want you. You are the iron ball to the iron chain that was my wife. This however… Jacob points towards the blood and whiskey coated KC. Jacob: He’s everything you should have been… Perhaps everything you still could be… Maybe it’s time for you to come home Jordan. Sirens can now be heard in the background as Jacob gives off a long and drawn out sigh. Jacob: I guess it’s time for us to go… I hope when you wake up you remember this. Gently, Jacob lowers his son's head to the ground and rises, wiping the blood from his hands on his suit pants. KC gives a nod and the pair exit, stage left. The last thing we see is the other members of FREELORDSHARK trying to attend to Jordan.

Marcus is definitely the heel lmao. John had a shoulder injury too. I'm not sure if you're being deliberately obtuse an trying to blend in "editing mistakes" through the fourth wall here or not.

A cockerel crows off in the distance as a pair of figures can be made out in the cold, weak, morning light. One is wrapped up quite well, rubbing his hands together as his breath comes out as water vapor because of the temperature. Ortiz: And you do this every day, big guy? The camera pans to Mark Reese, he’s not quite as wrapped up as Nate but his flannel jacket actually has sleeves for once. Reese: As sure as the sky is blue Nate, the farm doesn't sleep like you and I. They continue onward, their destination is a barn up ahead. Reese: There she is! Reese grins as they draw up to the massive barn, Nate looks on. Ortiz: It looks good, that paint we put on seems to have taken well. Reese: You’re right, seems like you’re a legendary painter as well as a wrassler. Both men have a chuckle to one another and enter. A loud bleat greets them as a small goat comes running over. Reese: Steady on there Goatista, this ain’t quite breakfast time yet. Nate eyes the small mammal. Reese: Nate Ortiz, meet Goatista Cesar. Named by… Well I’m sure you could work it out. Nate laughs and shakes his head jokingly. Ortiz: Couldn’t even guess if I’m being honest. Reese rolls his eyes before laughing as well. Reese: Okay so y’see those shelves that Colin set up? We’re gonna be movin’ the chicken feed from the pen next door up into that. Ortiz: That sounds like a long day's work. Reese grins. Reese: No way. We’re getting it done in half a day! C’mon… I’ll show you where to start. Reese walks inward and goes through a small door. Nate goes to follow and pauses, looking over his shoulder as Goatista eyes him with suspicion. The hall of shamer gives the animal a look before shaking it off to follow Reese.

More like inside him jokes.

I’m more worried if they try to start retrospectively fining people. They’ll be able to fund a week long Lution.

A couple of days after Riot has run its course we find ourselves at OCW HQ, primarily one of the most dangerous areas in the building, the doctor's room. In there we see Mark Reese, his eyes appear quite swollen as the doctor begins examining them. Doctor: Unfortunately very little is known about Asian mist Mark, it could take days, weeks, or months before the effects fully manifest. Especially if you took a full dose and a smaller dose from blocking earlier on. This particular strain is different because of Hito’s… Alternative… Diet. Reese: What should I do doc? Doctor: I think you just need to rest up, keep bathing it… Maybe relax with a friend just in case of any flare ups. As if on cue in walks OCW legend; Nate Ortiz. Ortiz: Mark! Sorry I couldn’t catch up with you at the show, I had some things to deal with. Hope you’re doing okay, that kick to the head looked painful! Reese smiles a little. Reese: You don’t need to worry about that so much, Mama said I got a head like Mount Rushmore. Ortiz: Sure, sure, I bet you do. So I heard they’re giving you time off? How about I come out to the farm and keep an eye on you… Just in case something goes wrong… Maybe I could learn some country things. Reese doesn’t even hesitate. Reese: Sure! That’d be great! We best get movin’ thanks doc! The doctor goes into a drawer and produces some eye drops and eye wash. Doctor: Just make sure to take these as directed on the bo- Nate interrupts the doctor with a smile, taking the medication. Ortiz: Don’t worry doc, I’ll make sure he takes it, he’ll get the best help he can. You ready to go Mark? Reese nods and gets out of the chair, the pair leave as the doctor looks on before he goes back to his work, anticipating a brawl at any moment as is par the course for the backstage savannah of OCW.

So here goes nothing. PAGE 1 Francis opens the show by pointing out that Kasstianity isn't the bad guys we think they all are, that it's Quartz' hair dye that's to blame. Talks up the match vs. VanPark a little, then says that he's stolen Rusts sister. The closing line about indoctrinating new members felt a little wordy but all in all a clear and concise effort. EMP dressed as April O'Neill bounces on out still drunk, she enjoyed the recent OCW TV shows, John Carder vs The Last Bullshit, hopefully TLBS now has a new meaning. Hypes the show, gets across she doesn't like Ashley and that she thinks Dupree was doing a bad job. I think Debbie is 100% right in that Jasmin is just trying to weasel her way back into the Gramazon's good books in order to try and get ahead. If anyone knocked on my door for a minute solid I'd probably try to skull them with the door too. Queen of OCW announcement! It's Lotos Flojo! MATCH - VANPARK VS. KASSTIANITY This match was insane, it was a fun tag match in which we watched Evelynn get smushed, then proceeded to refuse to leave the ring, making us all think the traditional Parker family fumble was en route. Then the other team started falling apart before our eyes. Mina though continues and looks like she's going for the finisher before Alexa retaliates with an incredible combo. It was so fast I didn't even see the finisher display pop up. Nice work everyone. Jordan Trance closes out page one by visiting a costume store earlier in the day, oh boy. ------------------------------------------------------ PAGE TWO We start now with Nate and Reese, at a stylist. It looks to me like Reese is being modelled to become more like Nate, as opposed to remaining true to his country roots. That stylist is also potentially a sexual predator. Catriona now on the phone to El Parca, I know a few jokes were cracked about the size of the phone but on second viewing it actually looks perfectly fine. Alyssa Marceaux is a bitch and hopefully her face gets crushed like Catriona's phone. Scotty X now has been lured by Kasstianity, much like Jordan Trance he now has the dreaded pamphlet. Queen of OCW announcement 2! It's the Women's FI holder, Harri Etiquette! Catriona is still in a bad way, I actually thought KC was going to do something sinister here but it works out he has some sort of soul. A wee hint to the old times, interesting. MATCH - Owen vs Chance Williams Another enjoyable match, even though Chance's brains are now spaghetti. I'm quite enjoying violence party OWEN. It's interesting that in the post match segment Elliott Parker is distracting Harris Turner all the while Chance is retiring due to his brain being cracked like an egg. I really liked the KC erratic energy when he came out. Elliott now distracts another member of the GOAT Academy... Derek, of all fucking people, happens to notice their partner is getting destroyed by ManBearPig in the ring.. But then Derek doesn't go out haha, "Yeah go save him Harris, I'mma chill back here." Rust has a spooky postcard and wants his sister back. Nice use of the red text to make it stand out. We close out page two with a hype video for Pandora, nicely done. -------------------------------------------------------- PAGE THREE The page officially opens with H20 and KD breaking bread and making piece. Harvey Hamilton Ocean welcomes KD to the Kasstian Church, KD apologises for trying to turn his spine into dust. Team OCW vs Kasstianity is interesting because if Quartz recruited half the locker room they'd just annihilate them. Of course it would be based on sheer numbers, if only that car bomb had succeeded, we wouldn't have H20. KD telling him not to be a sissy but now KD's direct target is poor Maxx Edwards. Speaking of Colin and Maxx... It's Locke & Key time. A little throw back to the storage wars (RIP Thomas Archer). I think Colin knows full well about being mentally tortured and how it changes you, so it's a warning that might not be needed. MATCH - Scotty X vs. Mystery Man It's Samsin! And he's here to beat up poor Scotty X. Very enjoyable hardcore match with Samsin showing how he can really do when he sets his mind to it. Fun finish, can't wait for Samsin to have more punishment beatings. Roy Brown and Jordan Trance are back, you better get a mooooooove on and read the show for this one. Claudio lets us know his feelings on bum ass convict Golden. Always enjoy a good Ry video. CG burying Jasmin and calling her a leach, wild. "bank-addicted drug robber Aries" I'm assuming that's a deliberate sentence as opposed to a mistake. CG basically taking shots at everyone to suck up to John after saying his partner isn't shit. Don't fool John, he's a bit simple. MATCH - Chris Greene vs. Mark Reese Reese returns, Greene sets out his stall and the game acts strange to all of us in the match. Chris is very fun to play against, hopefully get to do something in the future with them. Furiosa hammers home that Zoe belongs to the Kasstians now and Rust needs to fuck off. Furiosa using the word "cosplay" doesn't really fit in my mind, but it's there on the page. Queen of OCW announcement 3! It's Killer Heels herself, Ashley Moore. And that's a wrap on page three. ---------------------------------------------------------- PAGE FOUR Page four opens with my brain turning to soup after someone landed on my head and neck last night. It actually opens with Empress and Ashley continuing their feud with a near miss from a "family member" of Emp's. The BFF ring is hit. Dillinger and Sampsin have something brewing. What's the damn code?! Baxter is back out for the Clarke effect, it almost felt like a retirement speech. Maybe that's just me? MATCH - Sheldon vs Claudio Sheldon vs Claudio was mad fun. Not quite as fun as Trey breakdancing though. ---------------------------------------------------------- PAGE FIVE Terra SUE NOW!?!?! The wholesome attacks are getting out of hands. Quartz addresses the Kasstianity situation, he points out this isn't just a game, it's his life, it's still real to him damn it! Queen of OCW announcement! Who's that Pokémon?! It's Furiosa. MATCH: The Last Bullshit vs. John Carter Average match to be expected with such a gulf in skill. Hito's jibes made it acceptable as a main event in my opinion.

Didn't realise Caine was back to feud with Matteo.

Someone needs to unleash... A wall of text.

You feeling okay? You're very active on the forums right now.

Well we made it anyway, so fuck it

I'm just bumping the forum posts, cos we back to page two for the win. TO YOUR ANUS! Or whatever Jay said.

I didn't consent to this... But it's OCW, consent is entirely made up!

Put on some pants

Sometimes you just gotta eat a surprise beating. It’s always been a thing that Reese is trusting, perhaps he was too trusting having seen last weeks episode of “keeping out each other’s way.” Being pulled throat first into the rope by surprise would be the KAYFIZZ explanation for Reese not really fighting back. Segment itself was my idea, said to try and keep one-upping each other, I suppose it’s hard to have Reese trying to fight back from his knees because of the way the game works. I should maybe have story boarded it for the guys instead of just giving the barebones. I’m happy with what came out, if you think being hoodwinked by two hungry challengers makes Reese a chump then I can understand that due to the length and nature of the video but… We all saw what happened to the last guy to hit Reese from behind. ——————— Anyway the Parca return… It’s boring if everything comes after the end of a match in my opinion, doing something in the middle is just so sports entertainment, I haven’t watched anything on account of being in Ireland other than the quick beat down of Reese but I’d imagine a suitable competitive match was done which lead to decisions on how to execute this return. ———— I heard Reese was taken to a local barbecue facility to recover, but whether or not he’s cleared in time for the next show… Who knows?!

the man is a menace