Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Posted

**VFM's custom Jeep Wrangler stretch Limo pulls up outside of an establishment called "Le Magnifique Derrier". The camera pans closer to the Jeep then the shot changes to VFM and Jodie sitting in the limo, VFM smoking, and Jodie sipping a tea.**

 

VFM: How's your tea darling?

 

Jodie: Just perfect, the queen would be proud.

 

VFM: So...remember I said I had a very special surprise for you today?

 

Jodie: Oh yes dear, you've been so kind. The garments I bought from Victoria's Secret made me blush a little, but it's been ages since I've been able to spoil myself like that.

 

VFM: I'm glad you enjoyed yourself. Now...don't you want to look your best when you put those little numbers on for...your special man? **winks at Jodie**

 

Jodie: Well...I suppose so.

 

VFM: Good, because that's why I brought you here. It's a little place I like to bring all the special ladies in my life. It's called "Le Magnifique Derrier" and what they do here, is clean things on you that haven't been thoroughly cleaned in, what could possibly be your entire life.

 

Jodie: Did you bring your mother?

 

VFM: **flustered, and utterly disgusted** NO!! **regains his composure** I mean...no, she...doesn't like to travel much, and this is the only location on earth.

 

Jodie: My word, only location on Earth? How did you find this place?

 

VFM: Well, one things for sure. I was definitely not introduced to this place by a set of Russian twins named Svetlana and Natasha, I'll tell you that much. I actually Googled it.

 

Jodie: Google? What's the Google?

 

VFM: It's on the internet. Helps me find things. But that's neither here nor there, let's get you in there so you can get your special treatment.

 

Jodie: You're so good.

**VFM and Jodie inside of the establishment. The walls are covered with pictures of famous porn stars, movie stars and musicians.**

 

Jodie: Wow, la di da!

 

VFM: That's right, only the elite come here. This is truly a privileged establishment.

 

Jodie: So...what exactly am I getting here?

 

VFM: Yeah, they're just gonna bleach your asshole.

 

Jodie: WHAT?!?!

VFM: Don't worry Jodie, it's more than sanitary. Clearly if all of these movie stars and famous people can get it done, it's got to be good for you.

 

Jodie: I don't want people seeing my...fanny.

 

**VFM sulks his head down, and his expression changes to complete shame and disappointment.**

 

VFM: I'm sorry Jodie. I thought, that maybe this would go well with your Victoria's Secret garments and such. I've had it done numerous times...is...is that bad? You must be disgusted by me. I'm so sorry, I'm a fool for thinking you'd want to get you...fanny bleached...like Jennifer Aniston, and Brad Pitt, and...the Beckhams.

**Jodies ears perk up a bit.**

 

Jodie: The Beckhams got their...fanny's bleached?

 

VFM: Sure did. Look right over here on the wall.

 

**Points out a framed picture of a magazine cover showing the Beckhams. (all other pictures on the wall are head shots...odd)**

 

Jodie: Well...if it's good enough for Victoria, it's good enough for Jodie.

 

VFM: **beginning to look a bit more chipper.** Really? I thought you'd like it. Wow, you're so open minded, so much perfection in such a little package.

 

Jodie: Ohhh Versus stop it.

 

**Nurse comes out of the back area, reading off of a clipboard.**

 

Nurse: Jodie? Is there a Jodie?

 

Jodie: Over here dear.

 

Nurse: Oh wonderful. Now what procedure will you be having done today?

 

VFM: I'll handle this one Jodie. She's got a real SDW situation going on back there. How about you give her the works. **VFM leans into the nurses ear and whispers** I want it so clean, I can eat off of it. If it's any less sanitary than that, I'll make sure to buy this establishment, shut it down, and hire you as my own personal ass wiper. I eat a lot of red meat, spices and fiber, so you don't want any part of that, trust me. **VFM pulls his head away a bit, gives the nurse a wink and that evil little smirk.** So, can we give her the Beckham treatment or what?

 

Nurse: Absolutely sir, anything you say.

 

VFM: Good. Now, Jodie, go in there, relax, and have a good time. Remember, this is the star treatment, just for you!

 

Jodie: You're so good to me.

 

VFM: Someone has to be, right?! **Slaps Jodie in the ass**

 

Jodie: Ohh my. Ok, well, nurse, I'm ready.

 

VFM: Alrighty Jodie, see you when you get out. You're gonna have to show me how they did when we get back in the Limo.

 

Jodie: We'll see about that.

 

**Jodie walks with the Nurse to the back rooms. VFM turns to the camera, with that smirk on.**

 

VFM: Ahhh, Blade. Don't worry, your mother's in good, good hands.

 

**VFM shows the camera a bottle of His and Her's KY Lubricant.**

 

VFM: Didn't think I was going to use prison lube, did ya? Na, not for Jodie...not for my...special gal. Hahahahahaaaaa.

 

**Camera closes on VFM laughing.**

Posted

I can't even type how disturbing this was, so I'll let Youtube express my reaction through Stewie of Family Guy.

 

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6OkcucXIuVI&feature=related]YouTube - Family Guy - Breast Feeding[/ame]

Yeah... that about covers it.

Posted
As soon as I saw 'VFM' and 'Star Treatment' in the headline I knew I was in for a doozy. Never dissapointed.

http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g289/jlethridge1/kiss.gif

The DeanoHomo Club

Member

Kip Conrad

  • Administrators
Posted

Versies in 2009

"I want it so clean, I can eat off of it. If it's any less sanitary than that, I'll make sure to buy this establishment, shut it down, and hire you as my own personal ass wiper. I eat a lot of red meat, spices and fiber, so you don't want any part of that, trust me"

 

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s_p9AbWQ2wc]YouTube - Tossed Salad Man[/ame]

spacer.pngspacer.png
spacer.pngspacer.png
 15-06, 18:20 Tiberius Dupree make him tap with brownie mix

 

"Booking Wrestling is the most thankless no-win position anyone could ever be in. When things go well it's the talent that makes it work. When they go badly, it's because the Booker doesn't know what he's doing." - Eric Bischoff

 

Jookie: what website do we upload to againi for got

Our Hero: uploadafraud.com

Jookie: fuck u boricua

 

"I'm like Smythe, except Good" - Matsuda

 

OCW works best when it’s a melting pot of different ideas and opinions coming together to create some cool ass shit. It’s at its worst when people are only invested in their own/their pals’ content." - Paul Pugh
 

"I'm 5,9" - Ry
 

"I'm sorry if this sounds mean but OCW shouldn't be allowed to vote" - Jake Allen

Posted

Versus is so much better now that he's turned into Vince Vaughn's character from Starsky and Hutch

 

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-DnIGg0gWM]YouTube - Starsky and Hutch-"Best of Vince Vaughn"[/ame]

No.

×
×
  • Create New...