Useless Dane Xavier

That's a dramatic exaggeration, number one. Number two, I've gotten no complaints from anyone I've faced in DMs, and if they're just keeping a tight lip for the sake of not confronting me then and only then will I be offended. The end of Riot had me cracking up, especially Poling's closing line (see what I did there?). More later.

That will forever go down in history as the greatest Lution moment of all time... OF ALL TIME!

This is why I like you kid... ego...

THE CLASH BITCH! Get it on!

FFS GODDAMMIT Pugh! Twitter, bad photoshopping, you're like a more retarded version of Ryder.

I like that people speculate about these vids more than people speculated about the Jericho vids. Put the whole roster down as a possibility, because you won't see no airport pictures taken here!

Yeah, its me. I'm returning after a 19 month hiatus.

No Dane? Insane!

I think my ego just exploded... Thanks for teh props The Steve, it's awesome that there's an inactive vet watching the shows. We must be doing something right!

Tribute to the Troops arena, it must be used!

He's still got 2 pages to go!

Welcome back! I can't wait to see your new look. Was wondering what happened to you the other day, here's my answer!

There's a lot to be learned from this week's Riot kids, so put on your thinking caps and dig in! Jookie can change fast as fuck, Al Poling is relapsing and is back on some sort of drugs, Pugh is a veteran and he is also a jobber (doesn't make sense to me!) but he's also a very good RPer, DA and JJ build for matches but dont deliver (fuckin alts...), Robert Fearo isn't nearly as retarded as i thought he was, Matsuda booked a match that I may subsequently retire after if I cant handle two ass whoopins from KD, then come back a month later like it never happened... Bryan Lee apparently is a veteran too but i guess i have to be as old as Jaysin Sensation to remember a name like that, Sensation no-sells my rioting on recent Riots, DJack give us cheap plugs on movies that he's an extra in or something, I know how Matt Bloom feels, I <3 Jookie (no-homo) and am surprised that Leonheart didn't give a retirement speech, I'm a friggin rockstar from mars, tables matches must suck, Mez is a disgrace to his own race and I LOVE IT! And finally, Hostile is the king of the comeback! More in-depth analysis later on.

Just to get this out there, they fudged my suit combo and made certain items more expensive (damn economy)... the friggin bandana doesn't help... made that stupid attire ON THE FLY and have made adjustments since. I will post a late review in a bit, something for you guys to read on the day before this week's Riot. Work hard on that Thursday Riot gents!

I knew that was why we were booked together. Thanks for the props. More props to KD, he reversed the living shit out of me. I got my ass whooped but don't think for a minute I'm letting that happen again!

The camera slowly pans around a large luxury car store, showing all sorts of glistening new vehicles. The marble floors compliment these vehicles as they reflect off the freshly waxed floors. The camera finally comes to Dane Xavier and his assistant, Jasmine Dejour, being lead by a bald car salesman wearing a cardigan sweater. They come to a stop in front of a Bentley Arnage. Car Salesman: This vehicle screams class, but most of all it screams youth, two qualities I can see that you clearly encompass. Dane's eyes retract from the car and into the car salesman's direction. Dane $ Xavier: You're damn right I'm classy, and young you know it! If money weren't my middle name then it would probably be young, because I'm a young man of great youth! The car salesman chuckles. Car Salesman: Alright, wonderful! So you think this is the car for you? Dane looks over the car once more and notices his reflection in the tinted window. He quickly looks away in disgust as his own reflection. Dane $ Xavier: I'll take fifty of them. The car salesman's eyes widen as his gasps. Car Salesman: Fifty? Sir, are you sure you want fifty of these, and not fifty completely different cars? Dane $ Xavier: Look, I want fifty of these okay? I want fifty of these and I want all of them to be black. Whenever people see this car, I want them to associate it with Dane Xavier. I want them to see this car and say 'Hey, that man is young, he's classy, and he's got all of his hair!' Dane slowly looks back at his reflection and feels at the bandana on his head. Dane $ Xavier: All... of his hair... Clearly offended by Dane's statement and by his ignorance to how rude that comment was, the bald car salesman now seems to be wanting to hurry this sale along. Car Salesman: Will you be paying cash, charge, or do you want me to put on a wig and just start all over again? Just then, Jasmine interjects. Jasmine Dejour: Dane, what do you need a car for, and fifty of the same? You have a limo driver named Sam that owns a perfectly good limousine. Dane $ Xavier: I know that, but I must have this car. Perhaps if people see me driving such a sophisticated vehicle, they will recognize me for the sophisticate that I am and show me a little bit of appreciation! Jasmine Dejour: You already own like a hundred cars that you don't even drive. Besides, you will be shown plenty of appreciation coming up LIVE this Wednesday night on a Super Ultra Mega Deluxe Riot from the world's most historic arena when I will host Dane Xavier Appreciation Night! That is what the kids these days are calling a plug. Dane $ Xavier: That's wonderful Jasmine and I appreciate the gesture, no pun intended, but I'm buying fifty Bentley Arnages and there's nothing you can do about it. Jasmine Dejour: But aren't you afraid that'll make you look even more like RD Mo-- Dane $ Xavier: NO! I'm nothing like that guy! Just because I have dollar signs on my knee pads and I wear clever t-shirts doesn't mean I'm anything like him, not to mention the fact that I actually know what to do with my money! Dane walks up to the car salesman who is now holding a sale application on a clipboard in his hand, just waiting for this to be over with. Dane signs on the dotted line and makes his way toward the exit with Jasmine in tow. Dane $ Xavier: Now let's get out of here, I've got more stuff to buy for no apparent reason. The two make their way out the door, leaving behind a disgruntled car salesman. His assistant walks up to him with a feminine wig in hand. Assistant: Your wig sir? Car Salesman: Just... go away...

Boots... To... Asses...

Nothing should be above an 85.

So wake up taunts, do we consider that a pickup move where we cant do a ground grapple before hand? I'm assuming this is the case.

Dear Mr. Sensation, Good morning, afternoon, or evening to you my esteemed colleague. It has been weeks since our last confrontation and a lot has happened since the OCW season ended. I have grown accustomed to wearing hats and bandanas, the money hasn't stopped flowing in, and I have relocated to suburbia Wall Street to officially put an end to the Occupy strike. As your new neighbor, I welcome myself to the state of New York with open arms and greet you bearing gifts and expect the same from you in return. Please accept this "chocolate" and "Mountain Dew" in the package provided. I hope that you and I can have a lasting relationship as neighbors and that we will have no issue with staying off of each others lawns. Salutations and Happy Holidays, Dane $ Xavier P.S.: I really, really hate you.

He got famous and quit, this was his last verse!

Wrong.

Fair enough.