Michael Morrison

Needs more Morrison Method :P

Teen Wolf? Anyways, yeah, I got that Baxter explained why he chose Cam Ninja, but I still didn't understand the reasoning behind it. More or less, it would be like me tossing a 5 year old child to a known paedophile -- who happened to abuse me at one point -- because I wanted to show the world he's predictable. But, like you said, shit happens, plans go the way of the dodo and you make do.

MADNESS REPORT PAGE-1 D-EVOLUTION: It’s Hard To Grab Little Guys KD may not have to worry about facing D-Jack for his career in this episode of RIOT, but that doesn’t mean he’s any less upset about their last shindig. Much like Karim’s girlfriend, KD is having trouble accepting a harsh reality: It’s hard to get a good grip on small guys. Mad. Rep. ZING! As for Jookie: he’s scheduled to face another small-fry… or should I say another low-mein. You see, Hatachi is Asian and short, so he’s low to the ground. Low-mein… instead of small-fry… --__-- Would it be better if I just made an obvious reference to Jookie being Jamaican, but in a few months he’ll lose the accent and hail from South Africa? Or maybe he’ll pull a Booker and just change his accent at will… for no reason. SINGELS MATCH Dane Xavier vs Poison? Although Xavier’s old entrance tunes fit his character better, I have to admit I’m glad he changed it to something else, even though I’m still not sure if it’s the right change. His new theme might work on a deeper sublevel but for me it comes off as a bit too aggressive… especially when considering his entrance attire. As for his mystery opponent: No it wasn’t Poison. In fact, it wasn’t even an opponent that could be considered slightly harmful. In a world where Badass Bill could be considered a poison, Cam Ninja is equivalent to sniffing a marker… once… briefly. If someone like Guy Fausto were to pull this off, it would be accepted; as Guy has always walked that line between the 4th wall and satire. In Xavier’s case, however, it just comes off as an “I don’t’ get it” moment: It makes it appear as if Baxter was doing Xavier a favor. Maybe Baxter is trying to kill Xavier with kindness? ROCKSTAR: Party Like A Good Boy? Quite a few walking contradictions tonight. Justin is back to rock the Casbah (look it up if you don’t get the reference you damn Anchor Baby), but he’s trying not to rock it too hard. Back from a rigorous rehab regiment that probably left 36 therapists seeking therapists of their own, Justin may still be a fan of Kevin Hash, but no longer parties with Cocaine Beware. That’s right, I just made a drug reference using former WWF superstars and part of me is prouder than I probably should be. Also, Jim Black makes me sad for him... sometimes. PAGE-2 D. JONES: The World Is My Stage Dylan Jones (great name, by the way) makes a pretty good entrance. At first, I was worried this would be a rip-off of “Dashing” Cody Rhodes, but it’s more like a combination of Michael Heaton and Kurt Angle. Dylan Jones could very well be, professional wrestling’s only Oscar winning superstar… and considering the movies that most wrestlers put-out, he’ll probably be the last. You got the Mad One interested so far, Mr. Jones. SINGLES MATCH K.Dangelo vs Justin Rox I dig Justin’s all-around look… stands out to me and you can tell he put some effort. SMYTHE: That’s Why They Family Well put, sir... well put. Smythe closes the page with little hints of the happenings that will be goings-on during SummerCide. Sounds like it might be a party, but “re-inventing wheels” was mentioned, so I’m guessing it’s going to be OCW’s first ghost-riding party. You heard it here, first. http://www.topatoco.com/graphics/00000001/wigu-ghostriding-big.jpg PAGE-3 ??????: Shit Is Gonna Get Real Messy o__O He’s bringing HC back, and I’m not talking about Hot Chicks… although that would be nice of him. Now I’m kind of disappointed… should have used Hand Cranks or Hobo Crabs… maybe Hairy Chests. Anyways, the point is that someone returns and it’s a good return… not like one of them returns where you pretend to be happy but deep down you really wish they didn’t. I’m just saying. SINGLES MATCH Hatachi vs Jookie Marley Hatachi is on fire… like General Tso’s Chicken. One more racial joke and I get a free “massage” at the Wu Pun Tang Parlor. Wooooooo! XAVIER/BAXTER: +10 Armor But -20 Honor Baxter doesn’t really explain why he chose Cam Ninja… at least not in so many words. However, he did bring us back to Xavier’s D&D, cape wearing days and made his intentions for SummerCide very clear. All things considered, not a bad promo. PAGE-4 VALMONT: You WILL Let Me Finish That’s what I tell chicks on the bus once they realize I’m dry humping them. Anyways, Valmont comes out and pushes his weight around; challenging anyone who has the stones to roll them into the ring. WILLIAMS: Ready To Beat You If only the chicks on the bus responded to my advances that way. None the less, Liam Williams says he has the stones to face Valmont and is willing to toss them in the ring. The question is, will he be leaving with them? SINGLES MATCH V. Valmont vs L. Williams Vince McMahon approves of both attires. Maybe 3 people will get that joke… maybe. The important thing is that Liam Williams looks promising: he has a decent look and had a decent match against Valmont. VALMONT: Give Them An Inch… …yeah, you can guess what joke I was going to make. Valmont begins his “path of utter violence and revenge”, by not only defeating the young upstart, Mr. Williams, but also bustin’ him open. With his first statement made, he believes it’s time for his next move… at SummerCide; where his “utter” violence continues. http://i58.photobucket.com/albums/g267/jozimmerman/EvilCow.jpg PAGE-5 JOOKIE: Two In One Night Jookie goes over his match against Hatachi while Jim Black holds a mic… so obviously something else is gonna happen, because I’d hate to think that Jookie took the time to make this video just for… oh snap, Jookie just got D-Jacked (it’s not as bad as it sounds). Jackson accepts KD’s challenge by giving Jookie the message in physical form. Honestly, I think D-Jack thought Jookie was KD (because he can’t tell the difference like most white people), but after realizing it was Jookie, he figured he make it look intentional. Smooth move. TRANCE/GAINES: We Could End Him But can they, really? Of course they’re referring to Brandon Hostile: the man who would be our next North American Champion if everything continues to go his way. Many believe this poses a great threat to OCW, but two specific superstars know, first hand, just how serious of a threat Hostile can be. In fact, they may have to practice the old adage of “keep your enemies closer” in order to take out the mad-dog that Trance helped create. Can the master put down his rabid protégé, or is this all just part of the plan? Gaines is having trouble trusting Trance on this one, and I don’t blame him… Trance is a dick sometimes. Either way, I’m really hooked into this storyline and can’t wait to see how it all goes down. MAIN EVENT Brandon Hostile vs Nathan Gaines Is it Brandon or Brendan Hostile? Just asking. Back to the match: Apparently, Hostile has become such a risk that he needs two refs in his matches. Nice. It’s obvious that Gaines is willing to do anything to stop the Hostile takeover; resorting to dirty tactics in the match. Is OCW losing its last backstage hero? Gaines has always stood for what’s right, despite his numerous failures :P he always brushed himself off and continued to do -- what he believed to be -- the right thing for OCW. I suppose, getting run over and having to join forces with a sworn enemy can jade a brotha (I’m assuming he’s at least partially black). I guess we’ll see if the X-Pac of OCW is able to push through the storm and find the silver lining… or if he’ll embrace his inner dictator (I’m assuming he’s at least partially Cuban) and eventually turn to making homemade videos where he sleeps with masculine women? Bottom line, as I mentioned before, I dig the story so far and enjoyed how the match went down. Keep up the good work, felllas. NOTES: For those making RP videos, I’m sure Fausto or I have mentioned this before but a good rule of thumb, when trying to time the text, is to just read it at a normal pace and maybe add a second or two: usually if you know what it says already, you will read it faster than someone who is trying to make sense of it all. Also, if you are going to use white/bright text without an all black background, try to give it a dark border or shadowing so that it sticks out: words tend to disappear when they hover over the mat. Last but not least, make the text thick enough. Unless you’re making HD video, the text will get pixilation (or what ever the term is) and if the letters have thin areas, it makes it hard to read said text. While looking for the "utter violence" pic, I found another one that reminded me of Hostile. http://stuff.pyzam.com/funnypics/9/emocow.jpg << PREV / NEXT >>

As am I... could it have to do with "The Underground"? Wait... I would know if it did or not... nevermind.

The Pussy Palace Massage Parlor... where legends can get a legendary handy dandy?

I doubt they'd bring back the HC title just because I made a guest appearance... or even if I returned full time. I think OCW had it's HC era and Parker pretty much dominated, so I'd be fine with it never coming back lol.

Missing In Action: Where are Morgan n' Freeman? I'm a fan but it's been at least two RIOTs since they made an appearance, so I'm worried they'll fade into obscurity. Also... where you at, Valmont? Even though your return was met with some controversy, it had allot of buzz surrounding it. You came off strong, making bold statements and then vanish. I know it's only one show, but missing a show or two can kill momentum, especially now that there's only one show a week. I was hoping to see Valmont in a match or play a part in the Main Event somehow, but I got nothing... nothing I say.

MADNESS REPORT PAGE-1 INTRO: From the Depths An old, but familiar face starts off the show with an injection of Madness. That’s right, yours truly, makes an appearance and I had a-lot to say without really saying much. The dialogue went a bit long, but it was difficult to stop typing. None the less, it was fun to work on a RP again… and it was even cooler to see that it started off the show – although, I probably should have made the video smaller because it took a while to finish loading. KD has a match on the same page so his music pops up way before mine ever does. It made Mad Mike feel pretty gangsta though so maybe I’ll ask Smythe to hook me up with a remix. D-EVOLUTION: Hiding Like Waldo One thing’s for sure; D-Evolution is not hiding like Waldo, as they say. The roster is a little thinner and talent is getting harder to find, but KD and Jookie see it as opportunity. They are putting in the work and getting contender shots. Soon enough, OCW may finally D-Evolve… wait o_O JAKCSON: Needs Less Scallywags Jackson didn’t like the taste of KD and Jookie at the same time, so he’s hoping that trying them one-on-one will be better on his pirate pallet. He points out that he and KD have history and that KD has trouble with Ex-Division opponents, but if push comes to shove, there are plenty of weapons under the ring. Now that Xavier has turned his back on Jackson and Baxter, I would say that Jackson needs to find a way to stand out. As a group, they were gold, now it’s time to see how they fair alone. A win against KD could help keep him competitive, but wins only account for so much. SINGLES MATCH D. Jackson vs. K. Dangelo PAGE-2 DOUBLE-RETURN ALL THE WAY: What does it mean? An OCW EX-Division legend returns to usher in another golden age of small-guys wrestling reary reary fast. Unfortunately, his motivational speech is cut short when a certain infamous “Rockstar” interrupts and decides to make it a party. Impromptu match anyone? EX-DIVISION SINGLES MATCH: Legend vs Rockstar D-EVOLUTION: I Want Him Again KD was not happy with how his match ended and although Jookie tried his best to console a brotha, KD wasn’t hearing it. Frustrated over his current slump, KD demands a re-match against David Jackson and vows to leave OCW if he can’t defeat him. Not as epic as Career vs. Streak, but this could be epicly bad for Jookie and D-Evolution; as they seem so close to breaking that glass…. And I’m not talking about the glass window of the liquor store, you racist bastards. PAGE-3 XAVIER: To My Success… Xavier is living it up and it’s kept him so busy that he forgets where he’s at. Thank god for his assistant, Jasmine – who may be more than just an assistant – otherwise he would have forgotten he was even on RIOT. I’m still on the fence, concerning this new direction, but the RP’s are still written well and after tonight, everything will come together at SummerCide; according to the recently richy rich Xavier. On another note, does anyone else sing, “but there ain’t no cure for the SummerCide blues” in their head whenever the name pops up? Jut me, huh… fine. SMYTHE: Not Because I Want To Because he has to. He may not be the hero we deserve… but he’s the hero OCW needs. Sorry, I couldn’t resist the reference again. Anyways, Smythe makes a short but powerful statement, concerning the future of OCW. However, could this be just another of many “saviors” that claim to pull OCW out of the darkness (oh, the irony)? I guess we’ll fiind out at SummerCide, but if anyone can make little things stop and big things pop, it would be Smythe… or maybe Baxter… get it? NA CONTENDER MATCH Jookie Jam vs. Brandon Hostile Once again, Jookie appears to have a new attire for us to behold. I dig the colors… nice. Hostile still looks overly buff to me, but who am I to judge. BAXTER/DANE: Whyyyyyyyyy! The plot starts to reveal itself as Baxter lies in bed as a beaten man. He understands why Dane did what he did and accepts it. He even goes so far as to acknowledge Dane as the better man and perhaps the good-guy in this assorted business. It all comes back to Karma and turn-about as fair play. Unfortunately for Baxter, Dane isn’t done just yet. Barging into the room, Dane removes Baxter’s mask as he assaults him during his moment of weakness and vulnerability. I guess some wounds just don’t heal over time… they fester and spread until they consume the soul. Find out which soul survives the SummerCide blues. Yeah, I still sing that song. This could be a great re-birth for Baxter and Dane, come SummerCide. I’m still worried where Jackson will go with his character, but at least two of the three former friends seem to have something in mind. PAGE-4 TRANCE/GAINES/HOSTILE: Prepare For A Hostile Takeover BooYa; Hostile used the line lol. Where do I begin with this story of twists and turns? Trance was about to reveal who ran over Gaines… when none other than Gaines makes an appearance. At first I was wondering, “Wait… did Gaines hit himself with a car?” But Gaines goes on to explain how he believes Trance was the man responsible; stating that the benefit of getting hit with a car and rolling onto the windshield is that you get to see the driver’s eyes… and Gaines said the eyes he saw belonged to the wife stealing, icon beating, stone cold snake in the grass. Of course, Trance denies the allegations, but before the two can settle-up, guess who spreads a thick layer of sweet hostility all over their cinabon asses? That’s right, Brandon Hostile. Does this mean Hostile is the one that tried to end Gaines’ career? Will Gaines and Trance now join forces against the Hostile takeover? I don’t know, but SummerCide is building up heat. MAIN EVENT McManus/Fausto vs. Doomsday Theory Guy’s green tights serve a double purpose as the back-end makes his ass look like a Venus Flytrap. It sends a clear message: you don’t want to put anything in there. NEXT >>

2nd Page Push Post!

I know what happened: After watching Weird Science for the 100th time (it's a classic after all) you retired to your master bedroom, where you began your search of internet porn. You glanced at your PC a little too long and a light bulb went off....... .....you skull fucked your computer didn't you? It's OK, it happens to the best of us. Those blinking lights... the sound of the modem serenading you like a 60 year old bar-maid who chain smokes... the way the DVD drive ejects and reinserts. It's OK, Baxter... it's OK.

Interesting show, I must say... Ozzy would be proud. Anyways, people need to hurry up and post so we can get to the 2nd page: I promised Baxter I would give him a breakdown of the show because he can't watch matches on his PSP... I'm guessing his computer doesn't work right now or something.

LAWL

I think they're trying to say that having McManus as a partner is equivalent to a handicap match. ZING?

http://www.cio.com/images/content/articles/body/2008/10/Mr_Burns_150x176.jpg Excellent.

I gotta say, I'm a little sad to see Xavier turn on Baxter and D-Jack. Even though the combination of Baxter, Jackson and Xavier seemed like staff was trying to punish these three, by forcing them into a team, it actually worked really well in my opinion. Sometimes, it just takes the right combination of people to bring out the best in each other. Unlike some RP's or team-ups, I believed these characters could get along and they pulled me into their odd/gay/different little world. I could picture their movements and gestures while reading it and like I said, it just all seemed to click. So, as I stated earlier, the "swerve" seems unnecessary or at least a bit premature. I even think Xavier was starting to win-over some of the crowd, so to speak. I guess I just don't get the move... but maybe the answer will reveal itself or something... I dunno. You may have noticed that I referred to Black Dragon as Baxter. The reason is because Baxter will always be Baxter to me. He can put on a mask, pirate costume, space suit; it really doesn't matter to me. My suggestion for Baxter is to lose the "Black Dragon" and the "Chris" and just go with "BAXTER". It's a unique name and reminds me of Dexter.... who, despite having a last name, everyone simply refers to as Dexter. See, people like the catchy one names. Maybe keep the "Black Dragon" as a little nickname or something, but on it's own, it makes you sound like a 70's pornstar or an extra on 'Black Dynamite'. As for which Dexter I was referring to... it may be Dexter Morgan or the kid from Dexter's Laboratory, because I dig both shows and both are good examples. Trance scores a big win over Smythe... who doesn't fly off the handle after the loss. With the recent goings ons, one might think that Smythe is on the verge of turning.... face? But, when a Heel is so sinister and dark that even ashy skin doesn't lighten things up... is it possible to turn that frown upside down? Back to Trance: at first, I was a little disappointed that Trance didn't take the time to make a little RP or something to highlight his win over such a fierce competitor... but he added a little sumpt'n sumpt'n on the next page, so good on 'ya. Note: when putting together a flashback video package... it's probably best not to play the whole match in-full. If it was the end of the RP, then I can understand it -- some people may enjoy a trip down memory lane -- but when the RP continues after a 20 minute match; kinda kills the momentum. I watched the match and then pulled a, "Oh, well fuck, there's more RP after this." Something I wrote and then deleted after reading out loud, but then decided to repost just because (been doing that allot lately): "Fausto lays the pipe on Mayhem and does it like a pro." At first I was amazed that Valmont's return got such an odd reception: I didn't get a chubby or anything, but I thought it was cool to hear of VV's return. But... then I saw the video clip where he plays the various HOF intro themes and then I kind of understood. No offence to VV, because I find him entertaining and have no reason to offend him, but when compared to those, who's music we heard before yours... unless you were Ma'Jin, strapped to Sideshow's back as some kind of new version of MasterBlaster from Beyond Thunderdome, you pretty much set the audience up for disappointment. It would be similar to your GF saying, "Hey, as a special treat for your birthday, I went ahead and invited two of my female friends over for a 4-way" only to find out she was talking about playing Rockband and not the hokey pokey... if ya get what I'm sayin'. Sure, playing RB with three chicks can be fun, but it sure as hell ain't no 4-way.Then again, you did come back as a heel, so in that respect, it worked. None the less, welcome back sir. And yes, you do remind me of Orton... with a little bit of Batista (Ortista, if you will) but I was too lazy to see if your old CAW had full sleeve tattoos or not, so I'll just chalk it up to coincidence.

Anxious to see Fausto back in the ring. I actually didn't think he'd be in a match before the PPV, but now we'll see if he is able to boost his confidence, which is slowly building ever since he decided to be more pro-active instead of re-active.

Oh, that mothercanucker better not mess with Mayhem/Fausto. That shit is epic. It even has epic music. If I don't get to see Fausto get his ass kicked by Mayhem or Mayhem hit with a Cutter for the 1-2-3, there will be hells bells to pay.... moving along. *Listens to Jookies intro music and wonders if this is what it would sound like if Busta Rhymes were to do a cover of the COPS theme song* *Hears the intro music of Carlos Cruz* Now that's the sweet stuff. But seriously, I hated Jookie's intro music when I first heard it a while back, but it's growing on me... just a little, though... like a rash that you think might be herpes, but then you ask your friend, who has herpes and he says it's not, so you don't mind if it hangs around a little longer, because you know it's not something worse. Speaking of music: the Mayhem/Fausto epic music also played during the main event, but cut off right before the finale. Totally killed the mood, like when you're almost there and you're ready to pull out for the money-shot..... and the chick farts or something. You both pretend like you didn't hear it and that it didn't kill the mood... but you both know it did and you'll never speak of it again. And for all those who haven't experienced this yet, just remember that it's a blessing in disguise: You should be proud of your ability to make a chick lose control of her body functions during the horizontal mambo. I won't tell you what counts as bonus points. Back to Jookie... what happened to the attire from last week?

I watched the first page the other night, and saw that there were only two pages, but considering it was posted so early and the little, "video will be up soon" thing, I figured Leon was just getting a head-start... but nope, it really was just two pages. Anyways, finished watching the show and all things considered, it wasn't bad. I got to see my favorite new-talents in action, a Guy Fausto RP and lets not forget McMahonus vs. Poe in SUPER SPEED. Maybe go for LUDICROUS SPEED, next time.

As cheesy as it may sound, I was waiting for, "OCW is on the verge of a Hostile takeover."

Sometimes I don't know if the things you say are meant to be funny, or if you're actually concerned that Mayhem will forget to use them as headlights...

Even though the video isn't up yet, that first segment with Smythe and Mayhem was fire. I was hoping they would start throwing fisty cuffs or something. Good start.

........and I thought I was eccentric.

...interesting.

Was bored and felt like commenting on something... so yeah. My guess will be, "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?" A double handy? Didn't think Alex was a ski fan. He wants a push, but he's going to need a priest..... I said he's going to need a priest... like the band... gawd I feel old. I want to see this match, but if Parker is possibly too much for Xavier... what chance does my computer have? This is eerily similar to a real-life feud... http://www.foxnews.com/images/234591/1_61_102506_dick_clark.jpg vs. http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_VizIrBQwA8w/R46sWyWraJI/AAAAAAAAA6M/b1eHk0Izxc4/s400/geicogecco.JPG The host from Mt. Vernon faces the lizard from... actually, we're not sure what nationality he is.